I Regret Being A Slut

submitted by jet199 from bridgetphetasy.substack.com

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[–]TarBaby 5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 3 fun -  (4 children)

I was first inspired to write this piece when a 19-year-old woman I used to wait tables with asked me: “Bridget, have you ever regretted having sex with a man?”

I laughed. “Yeah. All of them.”

That’s not entirely true. There was my first love in high school. And my first husband. But if I’m honest with myself, of the dozens of men I’ve been with (at least the ones I remember), I can only think of a handful I don’t regret. The rest I would put in the category of “casual,” which I would define as sex that is either meaningless or mediocre (or both). If I get really honest with myself, I’d say most of these usually drunken encounters left me feeling empty and demoralized. And worthless.

What she is looking for in a man, is a dick and a pulse.

[–]CreditKnifeMan 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (3 children)

But if I’m honest with myself, of the dozens of men I’ve been with (at least the ones I remember), I can only think of a handful I don’t regret. The rest I would put in the category of “casual,” which I would define as sex that is either meaningless or mediocre (or both). If I get really honest with myself, I’d say most of these usually drunken encounters left me feeling empty and demoralized. And worthless.

It's interesting that guys can have similarly worthless encounters, and walk away feeling morale-y rejuvenated (a temporary increase in confidence, etc., But not an increase sense of moral ethics).

Both people with similar biological impetus, but the social expectations are inverted.

A case could be made for influence of a social construct in this regard. But it's also biological.

These inversed expectations exist almost uniformly, in virtually every culture.
I'm not aware of any cultural exceptions.

[–]jet199[S] 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

Girls can have similar experiences and seem fine too.

I think the issue is women who won't speak up and say what they enjoy and then have multiple bad sex experiences.

Also so many women have problems having an orgasm at all, which I think is a cultural problem not a biological one.

[–]CreditKnifeMan 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Also so many women have problems having an orgasm at all

Everyone lives in a bubble of their own experiences, and I remember thinking that this had to be exaggerated.

Do you think it's an issue where some women have difficulty with their comfort level (etc.), and that interferes with the process?

Is it an issue of men mishandling of hardware (operator error)?

Or an issue of the random combination of both conditions (or more)?

Master craftsmen simply don't understand what the hell is going on over there.

[–]jet199[S] 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I remember a midwife telling me that women have easier births when their husband isn't in the room because they are so worried about pandering to his needs and worrying about how they look they don't look after themselves.

If women are doing that in during something as serious as giving birth they are 100% doing that during sex.