all 3 comments

[–]thefirststone 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

A few comments down, somebody does (to use their language) validate the husband's reaction in a professional way. But follows it up with "I am in no way saying that my response is right or wrong".

This is the exact same sentiment as when you see disclaimers on reddit starting out comments with "absolutely" and "totally" and "completely" in order to defuse and disclaim any conflict ahead of time, so that they can suck ass without being considered a troll.

It's a very fitting technique to infantilize the ill and the wicked. The husband doesn't do it because he deserves better than this.

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

no need to read after this part:

" He's very neat and tidy and I'm already naturally a bit of a mess, but depression makes it worse. I would say that this is just my depressed brain talking, but I suspect my partner feels this too. "

get to cleaning up! stop being a lazy pig.

[–]jet199 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

This is pretty much how everyone deals with a depressed person.

"I don't know what to do with you"

Because it's the depressed person who has to get themselves better, everyone else just has to be there.

That's how it works I'm afraid.

Maybe the first time you go through depression you blame others for not making you better or loving you more but if you're 30 and still doing that you need to learn better ways of dealing with it.