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[–][deleted] 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I know exactly how you feel, well mostly: when I was in my first relationship, I was so into her because everything was SO new and SO exciting and SO overwhelming, I was blinded. I had also never felt so close to anyone emotionally. Looking back, I "knew" something was off; something felt off and I couldn't explain it at the time. I overlooked it and eventually those problems grew worse until we broke up. The same issues that came up early in our relationship were the same ones that ended it. It wasn't about sex though; I kind of had the opposite problem lol.

'Is she actually a lesbian?' IDK. I'm a lesbian but I'm also not into oral, either giving or receiving. It just doesn't do anything for me. Also I agree with LesChameleon, whether she's a lesbian or not doesn't seem to be the issue. The issue seems to be: is she all that into you? What raises concerns for me is that she "kisses [you back] with very little passion" and she's doesn't seem to want to work out a compromise with you/discuss it further. Maybe talk to her about it again and bring up how it makes you feel. Tell her what you've told us, if you haven't done so already, that it makes you feel sort of rejected. See if she's willing to discuss it further. If you two can't work out a solution, and it continues to bother you, maybe consider if this relationship is worth it? I know that SUCKS; believe me I KNOW. But seriously consider it, because it's better to end things early if it's not gonna work. Hanging on will only make it worse. But try to work things out first, of course. Maybe she's just bad at sex?

And no, your inexperience is not making you a doormat. But your inexperience might be blinding you like it did me.