this post was submitted on 23 Feb 2021

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How to make peace with being a lesbian as a 16yo with no lesbian friends

submitted 3 years ago by QueenOfTheNorth from self.Lesbians

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[–]just_lesbian_things 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun - 3 years ago (0 children)

A lot of lesbians were roughly in your position at one point or another. When I was a preteen/teenaged lesbian, I was very afraid of adult lesbians because in those days, lesbian children were unheard of and homosexual adults were portrayed as drug addicted sex predators. So in some ways, you're already way ahead of the game.

In general, I'd say it wouldn't hurt to take a look at what other women are doing. People don't always give good advice, so it's better to take things into your own hands. If you see someone who is doing something you want to do or is somewhere you want to be (a job you want, a lifestyle you want), it's a good idea to find out the steps they took to get there and tailor them to your own situation. There's a lot more option for women these days, but you should still play your hand carefully and weigh your benefits. Try to put yourself into a position where you can make choices. I see a lot of lesbian (and bihet) women get stuck in the home-maker role when they had other aspirations because they can't get over their mindset (see: real late bloomer lesbians). Be realistic, but also check your mindset to make sure you're not limiting yourself.

It is not usual for your parents to want the best life for you, even if they're initially disappointed and find the truth hard to swallow. The trans fad will probably blow over in another 5-10 years.

Personally, I wouldn't worry too much about not connecting with anyone in high school. I'm not in touch with any of my high school classmates. Unless you go to an extraordinary high school, it's going to be a small pond, and the rest of the world is always going to be a lot bigger. It's not to say that you'll definitely make meaningful connections outside of highschool, but not having that in high school isn't necessarily indicative of a deeper problem.