Where do you meet women?

submitted by Athelhilda2 from (self.Lesbians)

Covid lockdown really put a damper on my plans for this year. I had been planning on joining MeetUp and making friends, seeing a counselor for some issues I have, and figuring out my sexuality, among other things. I don't know what to do about the last one, as all the dating apps seem to be filled with men, couples, and trans women. So, how do all of you meet women you're interested in?

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[–]MannyMandrake 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

definitely not on dating apps thats for sure. It's always happened randomly for me. I met my current girlfriend at the dog park

[–]Destresse 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

How does that even happen? Lol

How did you know she was interested? How did she know you were interested? It feels like I'd have to wear a big badge saying "I'M A LESBIAN" for that to happen 😭 and my gaydar is very bad

[–]MannyMandrake 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think I just got really lucky. She was among the group of regulars who I'd see at the park everyday. It's easy to strike up conversations with fellow dog owners. I didn't know for sure that she was interested, but she responded well to subtle flirtation so I took a chance :)

[–]Starburns 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Most gay people where I live have rainbow/collars halters for their dogs, I haven't met a girlfriend that way but I've made gay friends hahah

[–]censorshipment 8 insightful - 4 fun8 insightful - 3 fun9 insightful - 4 fun -  (4 children)

Several Redditors from different states/countries wanted to meet me in 2020, but I wasn't going to risk it. I don't understand people's need to date during a pandemic... even if you use safety measures. My sister is a nurse and was very cautious until she started dating a guy and contracted covid in December... had to cancel her xmas vacation.

Anyway, I'm butch and can meet women anywhere if gay/bi women are confident enough to approach me in public. I saw lots of lesbians/bi women at a women's rally a year ago before the pandemic. I went to the rally with a friend I've known since 2015 who approached me at a BLM protest for Sandra Bland. She (a 45+ year old black femme) simply walked up to me and spoke.

Also, since I'm not white... I don't have to worry about white men larping as lesbians nor white "queer" women with boyfriends looking for threesomes. That's one of the few perks of being a black lesbian... the only thing I have to worry about is attracting depressed women, unfortunately. I think 3 of the Redditors who wanted to meet me had been recently suicidal. I don't want to deal with that shit. One woman showed me a scar of where she cut her forearm down the middle (not across her wrist). I've never been suicidal and can't relate to self-hating women.

[–]Anniesworld 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Did she show that cut to you on a first date? That seems like stalker level kind of stuff.

[–]Elvira95 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Some people seem too open about themselves. I've been suffering for mental health all my life, but I won't disclose it to someone after a first date, It would take months. You even ruin your chances of a relationship by appearing as a crazy woman who harm herself.

[–]censorshipment 3 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

Not a date. Online.

[–]Anniesworld 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Well I hope you have better luck this year.

[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I met my partner at a lesbian bar!

[–][deleted] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I have no idea. I have hardly gone out, let alone on a date, since covid started. I feel so disconnected right now. I had a thing with a woman who I met through (straight) friends I had through uni. Neither of us were out at the time. I still have a thing for her, and I probably need to get over it now.

[–]Shinyowl 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I have used a dating app known as "Our Time", for folks of a certain age. I have had some success, although there are always people, who for some reason, post multitudinous photos that look nothing like themselves.

[–]whateverbeaver 2 insightful - 4 fun2 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

In my dreams ;D

[–]Aurelius 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Online, but I think I'm getting too old for it... so I've become a solitary creature.