How far away is "normal"?

submitted by HelloMomo from self.Lesbians

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[–]reluctant_commenter 7 insightful - 3 fun7 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 3 fun -  (3 children)

Dude, you didn't even read the Gallup poll you linked, lol. It says 8% of millenials identify as LGBT. Of course older generations are dragging down the average, because many never ended up coming out of the closet.

Also, Stonewall or one of the other LGBTQ+ organizations found a prevalence of 8% of cisgender LGB among millenials, let me go find that pdf. Sure it's not quite 10%, but 3-4% is an underestimation (it's averaging across all age groups).

edit: GLAAD, sorry, not Stonewall, my bad. Here's a post about it on s/lgbdropthet: https://saidit.net/s/LGBDropTheT/comments/625t/i_made_charts_from_2017_glaad_survey_data_showing/

However, to your point-- many LB women drink the TQ koolaid so we have a much smaller dating pool, anyway.

From the GLAAD survey:

  • 20% of millenials identify LGBTQ.

  • 8% of those are cisgender LGBA, 4% trans "heterosexual", 8% trans "nonheterosexual". So less than 8% when you exclude asexuals... but more than 8% when you include the LGB people who transitioned.

  • 11% of millenials are LGB (including pansexual, excluding asexual). But of course, some % of these are trans and probably includes some AGPers and the like. So I think you're right about less than 10%, but it's much closer to 10% than the Gallup poll average would suggest.

[–]yousaythosethings 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I’m going to have to look further into this but 3-4% sounds way more accurate from my vantage point and experience. Anything even close to 10% seems way too high and I am not inclined to trust GLAAD as a source. Words have been bastardized beyond comprehension for maximum political gain these days and there are also a lot of LARPers/trenders. For example, pansexual often means woke straight (only ever been attracted to the opposite sex both open to the idea of the same sex). GLAAD in particular defines sexual orientations based on gender attraction. So you get people into the opposite sex but covering “all genders” and pronouns claiming LGB membership.

20% of millennials identifying as LGBTQ sounds especially like horseshit and I’m a millennial who has spent a lot of time living in concentrated woke epicenters so I already don’t feel like I can trust that data.

Propaganda orgs like these have every incentive to manipulate their data and claim the maximum numbers possible.

[–]reluctant_commenter 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

GLAAD in particular defines sexual orientations based on gender attraction.

Actually, believe it or not, it looks like they do define attraction as based on sex not gender-- but only for being gay/lesbian. (But their definition seems questionable-- it implies that one can change sex and doesn't mention gametes at all.) For bisexual they do define it based on gender. I'm going to guess they changed it for "bisexual" because of the dictionary overwriting of the term that occurred a few months ago or so. Their definitions page: https://www.glaad.org/reference/lgbtq

20% of millennials identifying as LGBTQ sounds especially like horseshit and I’m a millennial who has spent a lot of time living in concentrated woke epicenters

(Might remove this part later because I'm a fucking nerd and this is niche enough that I could theoretically get doxxed for it, lol.) When I was in college, I did an unofficial survey of sexual orientation of students living in my dorm and the % of these students I knew who were LGBTQ-identifed was at like 35-40% (and I could've missed a few people who were quieter about it). Not joking. A college with very affluent, and very liberal, students. I share this to highlight two points:

  • I'm unfazed by a ballpark of 20% because I'm biased, I see this shit everywhere-- and that is a bias I have. As you pointed out in your other comment, I'm at the tip-top of Gen Z so I know a lot of people like this. Like a lot. (The belief "everyone is bisexual" is very common among the people my age who I have met.)

  • I haven't looked at where GLAAD got their survey data from and I wouldn't be surprised if white, affluent students are way overrepresented in their survey data. Like my college classmates. Who is most likely to be exposed to a GLAAD survey and take it, anyway? (edit: This speaks to your point about GLAAD being a propaganda org)

Propaganda orgs like these have every incentive to manipulate their data and claim the maximum numbers possible

I think you are right, and I think I may have underestimated this because I started reading through GLAAD's website earlier today and there are a lot of inconsistencies and questionable claims. If I have the time this week, I might make a post about it on droptheT.

Thanks for sharing your perspective, I appreciate it.

[–]yousaythosethings 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

No problem dude. <3 I’ve got your back!

I'm unfazed by a ballpark of 20% because I'm biased, I see this shit everywhere-- and that is a bias I have. As you pointed out in your other comment, I'm at the tip-top of Gen Z so I know a lot of people like this. Like a lot. (The belief "everyone is bisexual" is very common among the people my age who I have met.)

And this is why I have lack of trust in a lot of the self-identification into LGBT. I think a lot of lesbians closer to my age have had enough experience by now to see conclude that the vast majority of women are not actually bisexual. But at least in part because pressure into performative female bisexuality for male benefit is forced on young girls and women, now coupled with the gave that LGBT identification is seen as connoting virtue and open-mindedness, there is so much incentive to identify in.

We all have stories of things along the lines of a girl who has kissed one or more girls while drunk or been in a threesome considering herself bisexual when it’s not sexual attraction to women that drove her into that activity. Additionally, some people like to test out and explore their sexual boundaries so they may mistake lack of sexual repulsion to the same sex as attraction, which I think is very different. I think to be very experimental, that lack of repulsion is key and I think that also has degrees. Some women can just make out with anyone but do they have an interest in eating or fingering a pussy? Are they turned on by a woman’s body outside of picturing themselves in a porn fantasy?

I feel like there has been an increase in young self-identifying “pansexual” women like this who my friends have had a lot of experience with lately, and they seem very detached and at odds with lesbians and very much come across as tourists. If you’re like me and not super keen on a relationship right now, it’s not the worst thing in the world, but it does feel like they’re trying to earn some street cred for being open-minded and to check that box before going back to men. They also seem very disconnected from the contours of their own sexual orientation, like they can’t describe what they find attractive in women (meanwhile, let me write you a novel), and fall back on cliches like “I’m attracted to everyone” or “I’m into everyone,” which honestly we know can’t be true. They often don’t come out at all to their families because why bother when they know they’re not going to end up in a same-sex relationship long term. And another thing I’ve noticed with some of them is that they hang around LGB people/lesbians, and there appears to be some imitation going on. Given my own circumstance, that’s hard to understand but I’ve seen it enough that I can see it’s a thing that’s happening. Like the trans/nb social contagion but often with less grooming.

So is this meaningfully bisexual/LGB? Yea IDK and I’d like to hear the perspective from bisexuals here on saidit, especially about the difference between attraction to both sexes (even if it’s uneven) vs lack of repulsion to one sex.

Plus now we have heterosexual and bisexual females identifying as lesbians and being the ones to date trans-identifying males. I think my time in r/LBL has ruined me because it’s so pervasive there that people are out of touch with their own sexual orientation and a lot of collective delusion as they rush to validate each other. Meanwhile they stay in their marriages and just buy flannel and jean jackets, post selfies, and gush over lesbian Tik Tok. Not to mention the whole “Tik tok made me gay” thing is not even actually satire because bored/boring people see lesbian/LGBT as a lifestyle and aesthetic.