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[–]Ricky_Ticky 53 insightful - 2 fun53 insightful - 1 fun54 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

I have many straight women friends who call themselves bisexuals even though their only bi experience was kissing a few girls at parties. What they really mean when saying "I am bi" is that they are "open-minded, modern and tolerant".

I also have bi friends who are fascinated by how intrigued people look at them when they say they are "lesbians". They like the idea of belonging to such a hidden, mysterious and unavailable to men group.

As a result lesbians are not being taken seriously and people think "well if a guy says he is gay it's irreversible but for a girl things can change". If I explain it to my straight/bi friends they are surprised big time, they were not aware of it and they stop throwing "lesbian" and "bi" labels where they do not belong. So I guess we have to educate, nobody is going to understand our struggles if we do not explain them.

Once "women with exceptions" understand that wanting to have it both ways actually hurt real lesbians, they are fine calling themselves just bisexuals

[–]Astrid2448[S] 34 insightful - 2 fun34 insightful - 1 fun35 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

I think you really hit the nail on the head. You're right, it's much more about image than reality. Unlike you, though, I've found that a lot of these girls aren't interested in hearing about whether this hurts other people. They get enraged if you even suggest anything other than them being valid.

[–]Ricky_Ticky 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Some women are very selfish, nothing we can do about it. But maybe some day they'll grow up.

It's also human to think how you feel is how everybody feels. Many lesbians share a similar story - when they noticed they like girls, they thought all women are like that. It's just the society that forces women to marry men but in fact all women like women.

So probably "lesbians with exceptions" think that every lesbian prefers girls but develops feelings for men as a "regular exception". And that is what being a lesbian is like.

[–]Astrid2448[S] 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I've heard them say that lots of lesbians must like men instead of accepting that they just aren't a lesbian. But that is a very homophobic thing to do. I would care less about this if they werent doing this in such large numbers and throwing actual lesbians out for even questioning it.