HomophobiaHelp I have a very low opinion of gay men TW homophobic

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[–]NutterButterFlutterStill waving into the void 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

Post has now been removed, and for anyone who can't see the archive:

  • Post is in r/gaytransguys
  • Post title: Sometimes I feel like I truly will be alone forever

It's only occasional. Like sometimes I go into depressive spirals or I hear ab my friends' relationships and it kinda just. Hits me. The feeling not a realization or anything, I'm not completely convinced I'll die alone and unloved. I'm an optimist.

But I think ab myself as I am. My identity, my standards (low), and where I live. Like I'm an asexual gay trans guy and I live in a rural ass area in Michigan. Not a lot of progressive ppl at least in my sense. I know a lot of gay guy culture is sex based - like hookup culture n shit. I.. do not like sex. I'm very sex positive, sure, but also sex adverse. I don't like sex, rather not have it, and that's a huge deal breaker for the general population, nevermind the general gay population. So I guess I'm kinda scared my small ass dating pool is basically non-existent cause I'm ace and knowing my luck all of the gay guys around me aren't emotionally mature enough for an actual relationship and only have the capacity for under the table hookups. And then there's the issue of my being trans that just adds a whole other layer I think is pretty obvious.

I guess what I'm rambling for is; there's a reality where I'm not alone forever, right? Someone will like me for all that I am and on purpose? There's hope for ppl like me?

[–]Virginia_Plain 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

Sad about the depression and so forth, but I'm really curious what these "ace trans gay guys" expect. So a gay guy has to be "emotionally mature enough" to have a sexless relationship with a chronically depressed woman who calls herself a man? What would this "actual relationship" look like? Celibate gay bestie?

[–]xanditAGAB (Assigned Gay at Birth) 6 insightful - 7 fun6 insightful - 6 fun7 insightful - 7 fun -  (0 children)

rural gay men love relationships without sex. And to help him out with not wanting sex, she has her vagina.

[–]Athelhilda4Questioning 8 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I’m wondering if the depression might be the root cause of her asexuality.

[–]Virginia_Plain 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

When I was depressed I didn't want sex, because I thought other people would find me disgusting to look at. You are likely on to something. The number of "asexual" people who look at pornography is also high too. I talked to someone who had a term for it, another one of those "ace spectrum" microsexualities.

The sexuality is there, it is just transposed onto electric statues: mute, pornographic images that are only a shells of the living, breathing people they came from.

[–]NutterButterFlutterStill waving into the void 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I don't think she has any idea. She's 19 and deep into the woo-woo: https://old.reddit.com/user/Xx_ShadowHeart_xX

[–]MyLongestJourney 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

" I don't like sex, rather not have it, and that's a huge deal breaker for the general population, nevermind the general gay population. So I guess I'm kinda scared my small ass dating pool is basically non-existent cause I'm ace and knowing my luck all of the gay guys around me aren't emotionally mature enough for an actual relationship and only have the capacity for under the table hookups"

What a wonderful mix of delusion and narcissism.

[–]lil_lamb 7 insightful - 6 fun7 insightful - 5 fun8 insightful - 6 fun -  (0 children)

Right, love how she basically calls them dumb for not having the “capacity” for “actual relationships” lmao. These people are so far away from reality.

[–]RippoffOfLoveSStraight | Overuses quotation marks 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Why was it removed? It seems plenty on topic for r/gaytransguys

[–]xanditAGAB (Assigned Gay at Birth) 6 insightful - 3 fun6 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Maybe it was too much stupid, even for them.

[–]NutterButterFlutterStill waving into the void 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Not sure. I just read their rules, and best I can figure is maybe the mods want her to flair it NSFW since it talks about sex, or maybe put a TW flair since she says she thinks she'll die alone and unloved?