Basically I was very afraid to be gay and always thought there was no way I could ever be one of those people. NO WAY!

Possible HOCD.

I had a very normal childhood with no sexual abuse, at least that I can remember.

Sad that he feels that he has to say that as that's probably what so many people's mind goes to. "No sexual abuse, brah!"

I finally found my answer on why I loved looking and acting like a woman but that I could still be heterosexual and that I was just pseudo-bisexual or meta-attracted to males. I was so happy that I wasn't REALLY homosexual even though being labeled as an autogynephile is probably worse from a social perspective. I didn't care, at least I wasn't gay! That would just be SO terrible.

It didn't take long before I felt that this was wrong. I thought, if anything, I really am homosexual and pseudo-bisexual or meta-attracted to females. My homophobia was so strong that for almost my entire life I wasn't able to realize this.

Meta-attraction is an interesting concept. In that sub, it basically amounts to, "I'm attracted/want to have sex with -insert sex-..... like/as a woman". And there's always that second part. This is why the consequent terms of pseudo-bisexual or pseudo-homosexual were created, to address this phenomenon. Here, they changed their mind about which meta attraction they even had, so I'm not sure what's what here.

I started thinking, let's play devils advocate here and that's where the detransitioners came in. I started reading all of the horror stories of hormone therapy side effects, surgery complications, skin damage from laser or electrolysis. I thought to myself, this just reeks of self harm masked in the promise of finding your "true self".

One less trans capture at least.

I knew at this point that I was 100% not a woman trapped in a man's body. I was just a man in a man's body.

Why does this sound so much like the concept of a soul? Gender identity rhetoric is essentially just repackaged otherworldly spirituality. I can understand the appeal in our society where individuals are increasingly disconnected from the tangible world(due to lacking in physicality-grounding labour/activity and specialization in highly conceptual fields/disciplines) and with no strong sense of identity. Religion(otherworldly especially) was and still is the opiate of poor people. Perhaps gender ideology is the neo-opiate of younger generations that are relatively poor as well as lacking in real-world success and lack identity as a consequence.

I love being smoothly shaved, wear make up, wear wigs (they make a nice hat haha!) and my favorite thing to wear are dresses that are above the knee. Pretty much the only underwear I wear are thongs. The question I asked myself was, does clothing logically have a sex? My answer was, of course not, it's just fabric haha! This realization helped me feel way more comfortable wearing these items in public. I use the men's restroom and get weird looks but hey, I AM A MAN. I absolutely love sucking cock and getting fucked in the ass. I'm a homosexual man and thankfully I realized this before I messed my body up with hormones or surgeries. Be careful out there guys and consider my story, you might be like me. :)

Well, he seems happy anyway...