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[–]stunaep 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I know that if I start dating a guy now, before I'm out as trans and fully passing as a guy, it'll be seen as a straight relationship which just feel so shit.

I just hate the thought of being a creepy straight girl who just finds gay guys hot so much, it makes me feel so horrible and icky and it makes me insanely dysphoric because I know that that's not the thought that a cis gay guy would have.

Yeahhhh that's not what gender dysphoria is, even a little. She could possibly be experiencing actual dysphoria, however "that's not the thought that a cis gay guy would have" is not it.

Sounds like she knows what she's doing and feels bad about it and when she actually accepts she's just fetishizing gays/being gay or whatever, she feels guilty and disgusted with herself.

[–]INeedSomeTimeAsexual Ally 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Her dysphoria is just her realizing she's disgusting for fethishizing gay men.