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[–]AllieKate 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

"I have used "they" when I legitimately don't know if I am referring to a man or woman"

Right. The difference between using "they" when you don't know the person's sex and using "they" when you are only pretending not to know the person's sex is THE difference "they" won't acknowledge.