Were you referring to this conversation? If so, just wanted to say-- I'm sorry if I came across as terse!

That's the one! And I hope that I didn't make you feel as though you'd misstepped-- I know that I'm hypersensitive to disapproval, which includes perceiving it when it isn't actually even there. (My therapist has noted how quickly I tear up when I feel that I might have disappointed him.) I'm trying to bring this emotional reactivity to heel, with some success-- but it still gets away from me sometimes.

I've been a little more stressed out than usual recently-- I have some personal life stuff going on that's been throwing me off lately.

I certainly understand. Hope that you get out from under this stressful stuff sometime soon! (And if you'd ever like to talk about it, please feel free to PM me.)

Hey. I hope you're not beating yourself up over this.

That's very kind of you <3. I do seem to have something of an affinity for prickly people, and feel compelled to win them over... which, as insecure and easily-hurt as I am, often blows up in my face. Not that this excuses their behavior, of course-- it's more like: if I take some responsibility for gravitating towards such people... then I also have some control. Meaning that I can make different choices, you know? I can connect with people who aren't "difficult" instead. Though admittedly I'm better at appreciating this on a theoretical level than actually putting it into action! So far, anyway. But hey... baby steps :)

If/when we all move to another site, I think it would be worth having some discussions about the effects of this whole situation. Like, how people are feeling about everything; about this situation of getting harassed by (overwhelmingly straight) TRAs on multiple platforms now. I think this situation is actually a microcosm of a universal condition of being LGB, which is that there aren't that many of us. We're a tiny statistical minority, so it's easier for angry homophobic people to shout over us. On top of that, we also have much higher average rates of significant trauma than straight people do, and that may leave us with less energy to spend on the stupid internet arguments and mind games of the terminally online.

This is such a good point! Heterosexuals-- even "allies"-- pose an inherent threat to LGB people simply as a function of sheer numbers. They can easily swamp us... without even meaning to. This is something that the straight majority needs to be aware of. And they need to make sure that this math is never allowed to put us at a disadvantage-- intimidate us; silence us; colonize our spaces. Which, of course, would require true allies to stand with us against the forces of gender-woo. The TQ+ are just the latest batch of straight people who feel entitled to tell us how we "should" be. Before, it was the way that suited their god; now, it's the way that suits their own personal fantasies. But always, it's about THEM. And their never-ending gender nonsense. Neither of which LGB people should have to give a flying fuck about (excuse my French). We LGB people definitely need to discuss this, defending ourselves from being run over by straight people (whether clueless, malicious, or both), and addressing both in light of the prevalence of trauma in our own community.

Sorry, there's my ramble you never asked for, lol. Anyway, just wanted to clear that up. Hope you're doing well, Pensee.

Well, I would have asked for it! :) Because you're so very right. And, hell, I just made ya wade through MINE! I am doing well... in no small part because of you, Rellie. Here's wishing you the same 💜

edit: I'm glad to have given you a literal LOL-- especially with all you've done (and are still doing) for this sub :)