ColonizationLesbianing as a man is sooooooooo exhausting

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[–][deleted] 20 insightful - 1 fun20 insightful - 0 fun21 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

i feel like tme lesbians still view trans women as less than.

No, they view you as a man, because you are a man. If you think man is less than a woman then that's your own issue.

[–]CancelPowerSuper Bi Male 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

"it’s so weird to me how i can go on multiple dates with a girl and after i open up about being trans they act weird.

even though im stealth (nobody in my life knows im trans except for a few people) and have had most “surgeries”, i feel like tme lesbians still view trans women as less than. i also hate dating apps lmao"

What a bunch of bullshit and lies. I'm 100% confident that this man doesn't pass nearly enough to go "stealth" and the only date he had in his entire life was in his own dreams only. Most trans people who say things like "I have been on dates with girls, we were soooo in love then I told her that I'm trans and she rejected me" or "I'm stealth, nobody knows that I'm trans" are completely in denial and making things up. That date was probably not even a date, it was just a normal hanging out with friends thing and this guy, like the weirdo he is, thought of it as a date.

[–]julesburm1891 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

That date was probably not even a date

Perhaps other women here have had similar experience. I’ve had a whole bunch of encounters where I had a very run-of-the-mill conversation with a guy at a party or a bar and he thought we had some chemistry and I was into him. I’ve also had very normal friend things (e.g. going to get a cup of coffee with a guy) where he thought it was a date and got upset when he realized it wasn’t.

For whatever reason, there seems to be a segment of straight men that can’t read any interaction with women as anything other than romantic interest. It’s like they can’t wrap their heads around that people can talk and be friends. These guys also don’t get that women are socialized to be nice. Just because we listened to your whole boring story about getting into craft beer doesn’t mean we’re interested. We’re just being polite.

OP gives off every indication of being that type of guy. The women hanging out with him are doing this as friends. They think it’s all fine and dandy until he mentions he’s trans. They fucking know he’s trans, but didn’t care because it’s just a friends thing. The second he says that though he’s announced he thinks this is a date. So, now, they have to contend with the whole bruised ego bullshit and accusations of transphobia when they have to let him down. OP is so clueless he doesn’t even understand why they’re being awkward.

[–]reluctant_commenter 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I’ve had a whole bunch of encounters where I had a very run-of-the-mill conversation with a guy at a party or a bar and he thought we had some chemistry and I was into him.

YES. I literally came here to say this. I had a friendly conversation with a maintenance guy at work and then at the end he asked me out. Like, WTF? I was so surprised it took me a few seconds to even respond.

Experiences like that make me feel wary about even just expressing warmth or friendliness at all towards men I don't already know. I hate the idea of having to act cold like that, but honestly at some point it's just the practical thing to do.

OP gives off every indication of being that type of guy. The women hanging out with him are doing this as friends. They think it’s all fine and dandy until he mentions he’s trans. They fucking know he’s trans, but didn’t care because it’s just a friends thing. The second he says that though he’s announced he thinks this is a date. So, now, they have to contend with the whole bruised ego bullshit and accusations of transphobia when they have to let him down. OP is so clueless he doesn’t even understand why they’re being awkward.

Yup. Exactly.

[–]julesburm1891 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I had a friendly conversation with a maintenance guy at work and then at the end he asked me out.

Are we the same person? I have had the exact same thing happen to me. “Thanks so much for fixing that light! [Insert basic conversation about hockey after noticing his lanyard.]” Then he’s suddenly asking for my number.

[–]reluctant_commenter 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah exactly!!! Apparently we are lol, because I'd hate to think this type of experience is even more common than I assumed it was! Like, my fault for assuming I could just have a regular friendly conversation with this person, wow. And then men will be like "Women are so cold to me"... like, yeah, we have to be, or a bunch of you will take our casual friendliness as a sexual invitation.

[–]Femaleisnthateful 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

This. In my experience the transwomen who "pass" best are the HSTS. No straight male Learning as a lesbian is ever remotely convincing.

[–]SerpensInferna 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That is always my first thought. THEY KNOW YOU ARE A MAN, IT IS IMPOSSIBLE NOT TO.

[–]wafflegaffWoman. SuperBi. 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If you know what "lesbian" actually means then you know it doesn't need any acronyms tacked onto it.

[–]ChunkeeguyTeam T*RF Fuck Yeah[S] 8 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

And speaking of exhausting...

[–]JulienMayfair 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

Doctoral work? This was written by someone in a PhD program? Must be Gender Studies . . .

[–]reluctant_commenter 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I sure hope it's someone from one of the humanities, but honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if it were a sciences program.

Also, this guy is 22. In the US, that's practically speaking the youngest age you could be in a PhD program, I think, so he must've just started. Maybe he'll pick up some logical reasoning skills along the way...

[–]CancelPowerSuper Bi Male 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

His grammar is pretty bad though, I highly doubt it's a science program. Like, I'm not a native English speaker and I realize that my English isn't perfect but even I don't write the way he does. It's just weird, he writes like a 14-year-old on Twitter.

He's either lying or it's gender studies.

[–]reluctant_commenter 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Would not have guessed that you're not a native English speaker, your grammar is great.

He's either lying or

Well, he is already lying about being a woman so I would be willing to believe it, lol.

[–]CancelPowerSuper Bi Male 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thank you! (:

[–]automoderatorHuman-Exclusionary Radical Overlord[M] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

RIP Snappy, I AM THE NEW GOD!

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