DiscussionQueer activism hasn't "normalized" homosexuality, it's only made fetishizing it more acceptable.

submitted by lunarstrain from self.LGBDropTheT

Somehow, despite being in vogue, homosexuality is still taboo and titillating to so many people. The incessant discussion of sexuality, people looking for any reason to claim a celebrity is gay, talk of "gay sex", it feels worse than it did when I was young. Then it was to disparage, now it's for fetishistic desire. They want to be a homosexual of the opposite sex and they want the people they find attractive to be homosexual. They use queer theory to escape any repercussions of this dehumanizing deviancy by slapping a couple labels on themselves. It's all so creepy.

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[–]Mermer 28 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 0 fun29 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Fr, the movement only makes it look like it's a choice. "Women are great" "dating women is so much better". No. Sure, I like being a lesbian but I also hate it. It's so lonely. It's not a fucking aesthetic or something I wish I was because of the world we live in that is not your internet fantasy. This kind of narrative only makes more straight girls say shit like "I wish I was a lesbian". It's so fucking insensitive. I don't like women because they're better. I simply am attracted to them because that's just how I am. I'm tired of being treated like a joke.

[–]Mikulbleu 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

My favorite is the bisexual woman with rainbow hair who’s married to a man with children always ends up as an “LGBTQUIAKCKCOFOEIE” advisor on some school or college board claiming to represent us because she’s “queer” apparently

[–][deleted] 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

It's the desire to be different than the norm since so many of these people are afraid of being normal. Since gay rights had to be stapled to left wing movements due to Social Conservatives many decided to adopt it as shield (if you are straight white guy just wear woman's clothes and now you are a victim) or since it was seen against the "establishment" as a relationship it was better than the normal straight relationship.

As older generations die off and social conservatism becomes less relevant or changes into something else the goal should be normalization so that people don't use this identity as some social statement.

[–]Mermer 16 insightful - 6 fun16 insightful - 5 fun17 insightful - 6 fun -  (0 children)

As older generations die off and social conservatism becomes less relevant or changes into something else the goal should be normalization so that people don't use this identity as some social statement.

This. Too many girls seem to "be gay" just for the sake of being different and pissing people off. All while having a boyfriend. So gay 🙃

[–]hufflepuff-poet 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

It's the desire to be different than the norm since so many of these people are afraid of being normal. Since gay rights had to be stapled to left wing movements due to Social Conservatives many decided to adopt it as shield (if you are straight white guy just wear woman's clothes and now you are a victim) or since it was seen against the "establishment" as a relationship it was better than the normal straight relationship.

I wish straight people would understand that it's normal to be gay. Homosexual and heterosexual are just the two sides of the coin of possible monosexual orientations, humans can have (& other sexually dimorphic species). The coin flip is weighted towards heterosexuality because it's weighted towards reproduction but that doesn't mean homosexuality isn't normal or natural, it's just the odds lean towards heterosexuality or bisexuality.

Homosexuality is not a kink or queer or weird or gross, it's just being exclusively same-sex attracted, not opposite-sex attracted.

[–][deleted] 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah hopefully social trends will get bored of fetishizing homosexual relationships. I mean it can't last forever right lol? Has to be something new that will be hot and in vogue that will come out so that eventually gay/lesbians/bisexuals can just fade into the background which outside of narcissists I think most desire.

[–]lunarstrain[S] 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

It's the desire to be different than the norm since so many of these people are afraid of being normal.

That definitely seems to be a part of the draw for the autohomosexual but sexual fetishism is what sets them apart from the "non-binary" people of the world. You could easily claim to be demiqueerfluid and change nothing about your life while receiving attention and praise. The group I'm referring to actively pursues lesbians and gay men, because they want to make believe they're in a same sex relationship.

As older generations die off and social conservatism becomes less relevant or changes into something else the goal should be normalization so that people don't use this identity as some social statement.

Agreed. I would love for sexuality to be mundane. I put normalization in scare quotes because they're always making social media posts about normalizing random things. "Normalize men with breasts!"

[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I think even then though those that pursue lesbian/gay people the prime motivator is that it suits their validation. What specifically do lesbian women/gay men have that someone straight or bi doesn't? Validation that they are found attractive by someone who is supposedly same sex. That they are in fact the identity they claim. If gay/lesbians didn't find them attractive you confront the hard reality that exists. There are fetishists who probably get off on making others uncomfortable knowing they don't pass but I think those are pretty small. Still this all comes back to wanting to cast off their original boring self as some straight dude/girl and be more exotic at the end of the day. They don't want to be normal they want to be part of a special identity.

[–]lunarstrain[S] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If gay/lesbians didn't find them attractive you confront the hard reality that exists.

That's the weird thing, these fetishists can be a lot more resilient than your average TQ+. Largely because it's about self perception and fantasy, that isn't to say that it isn't heightened by validation, but they can get along fine without it. It wasn't until recently that external validation was even on the table for them.

I remember online in the 2000s coming across groups of Yaoi girls who fantasized about being the insultingly stereotypical gay men from the manga they read and no homosexuals would give them the time of day. They were often publicly mocked, and yet, they continued to indulge because of the sexual motivator.

[–]Mikulbleu 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Its almost as if they’re just expecting us to be a prop for them to validate their make believe sexuality. It reminds me of when a white person tries to soapbox for the black community because “muh black friend.”