The NB/TRA slogan of "lesbians have always had a difficult relationship with gender!" Has always bothered me as an actual lesbian myself. They are blatantly saying lesbians are not real women. Our difficult relationship with gender is not solely based on being a lesbian but about what the majority of people expected us to be as women for most of human history, which is being straight and a maid to our husbands.

Yes, exactly!!! You know, it bothers me how the phrase "difficult relationship" can be used to obscure what is actually the problem. Why don't we talk about the actual problems-- those specific sexist and homophobic expectations?

I'm grateful to have been raised by strong women in my family who taught me that I can act, dress, and just exist however I need and still be a woman.

That's great :) I wish I had a similar upbringing. I am always glad to hear when other women have; if I ever have kids, I hope to do that for them.