Legal Rights / PoliticsThe Buttigiegs aren't gonna make it

submitted by PatsyStoneMaverique from politico.com

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[–]reluctant_commenter 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Oh, sorry, I misread what you said lol. I meant to ask about this:

There's a social taboo among wealthy American liberals, you have to announce to your social circle that you're gay before the age of about 20 or something is deeply wrong with you. Even 20 is getting a little old, but it's the cut off in my estimation.

Is this a thing? I would love to hear more about it, if it is.

They seem to look down on their own candidate, too, who is a grown ass man that obviously doesn't want to star in a soap opera.

Yeah, they do. The tone of the article is very condescending, I'm surprised it seems to be pitching itself as "progressive" or something.

[–]PatsyStoneMaverique[S] 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

this a thing? I would love to hear more about it, if it is.

It's always been like this with certain types of people who consider themselves straight allies. I grew up in a rural, conservative area that had a lot of "liberals" who really didn't understand gay issues but blindly supported gay political causes because it was part of a self image and a lifestyle they were taking part in.

They'd sniff you out, push you to identify yourself, if you refused they'd bully and harass you.

I had a teacher like this at my high school who was an asshole to me and a (future) gay guy in our class. She looked down on us, I guess because we weren't coming out to her satisfaction. I was being bullied and called a lesbian by a different boy in front of a group and this teacher stepped in and told him I wasn't ready for that, with this shit-eating grin on her face. The tone was very much "she's a lesbian but she can't deal with it, isn't that pathetic?" Fucking humiliating, plus it was essentially an endorsement from a gay authority to keep bullying me.

This same woman had publicly defended a lesbian prom queen a few years earlier during a big scandal where she wanted to take a girl to the dance and wear a tuxedo. Whoop dee doo, still a nasty cunt. Fuck her.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

That teacher should have been fired. You don’t pressure people to come out. They may have their own reasons for not doing so, like not being certain, not having a supportive family, working in a homophobic environment or maybe they just don’t want to be around obnoxious social justice warriors.

My sister used to be like this. She suspected I was gay when I was 17, and would urge me to come out. Because she was "such a good ally". Then my mother ordered her to stop doing that. My mam knew I wasn’t ready. So my sister backed off. My sister is a lot better with it now, because she’s come out as bisexual a few years ago and realises that sexuality is not something people should wear on their sleeves or make a fuss about. She respects my wish to not make a huge deal out of my orientation. But that was after boundaries were laid down.

[–]PatsyStoneMaverique[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Yeah, I do think some of it just stems from a lack of empathy or personal experience. Your sister may not have cared you were gay, but it's not all her. There are bigger consequences to accepting sexual orientation than your siblings' opinions 😜

Good for your mom reigning her in, sometimes people just need to back off. Now she knows and she can handle the same situation more wisely. Kind of curious, is she older than you? You came out before she did?

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

She’s younger than me. I came out as gay before she came out as bi, at least I think so. She mentioned being bi in passing when she was 15, but I said nothing, assuming she was going through puberty and never thought about it. Then she told me five years later she is bisexual, and I understood then. Maybe she told our parents before telling me, and didn’t tell me until she was 20 because she thought I knew or realised it wasn’t a big deal. She’s come a long way since.

To be fair to my sister, she was young when she was pressuring me to come out. Still a teenager. When someone is in his or her 30s and bullying a gay person to come out, then that becomes inexcusable.

[–]PatsyStoneMaverique[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Yeah, kids make mistakes. Adults make choices.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Well said.