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[–]our_team_is_winning 9 insightful - 2 fun9 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I'm female, so let me ask the gay men:

I went to a "men's" sex party I found online.

Do you guys just randomly post online "gay sex party, strangers welcome"? I'd think for everyone's safety, there would be some screening process? Not just the disease risk but violence -- psychos could show up, people really high on bad drugs -- are there bouncers?

Even if such parties are the norm, I still think her story is BS fantasy. But her fantasy is to have live-action porn, really. She wants to watch gay male strangers having sex where she can watch and get off. She wants props for her fetish.

She needs therapy and to leave gay men alone.

[–]CaptainMooseEx-Bathhouse Employee[S] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They happen. Not all the time, but enough that her story sounds plausible to me. I'm guessing it was organized through Fetlife given the sheer number of interesting characters she described.

Typically for something run by gay men, in another man's home, it's word of mouth/networking. The host tells a few guys who he trusts to make good choices who in turn follow suit. Pre-COVID, I heard of a guy locally who would host a weekly sex party for older men and charge $10 a head. The first bunch had just been guys he'd been FWBs with for a while and anything they knew who would be cool and interested. Anyone invited is, in essence, supposed to be pre-screened by the guy who extended the invitation. Disease is at your own risk because you can bring your own condoms.