LifestyleHow was your experience as a gay or bi person in high school?

submitted by oofreesouloo⚡super lesbian⚡ from self.LGBDropTheT

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[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

I didn’t fully come to terms with my homosexuality until was a few weeks into college, and it took years before I was comfortable coming out to other people, but when I was in secondary school I was in and out of the closet. Some days I’d say I find men attractive, other days I’d deny ever saying such things. This was mostly because I was confused and wasn’t sure if I liked males, but also because sometimes I was frightened by the thought of being gay.

Would you consider that your experience was positive or negative overall? Why?

Positive, I guess? If I had the balls to come out as gay at 15 or 16 and owned it I suppose most of the school would have had my back. People made jokes, but they mostly made jokes about me being a closet case. But here’s the thing about Irish secondary schools back then: you got made fun of for whatever reason, and there was no sacred cow. Everyone was made fun of, and if you took it in stride or gave back as much as you got, you’d make friends. Even if I was straight they would have slagged me over something else. When I learned how to take a joke and laughed at myself, the other kids started to like me. My guess is that most of the other kids knew I was gay, but understood I was struggling with it and never confronted me over it.

Do you feel like you missed out on certain things because you were gay or bi? If so, which things? (ex: dating, lack of friends because of bullying/not being able to relate/etc etc)

I’ve never been on any date in secondary school, simply because there was no openly gay kid in my school. I’ve had friends but I did struggle to socialise with the other kids because I’m an introvert. Me being the possibly gay kid in class didn’t have an effect on my ability to socialise.

How do you feel being gay/bi has impacted you as a person? (On a positive side for example, do you feel you became a more open minded and non judgemental person? On a negativa side, do you feel you became a more anxious person? Etc etc)

On a positive note, my homosexuality is still a conversation starter. On a negative note, people expect me to be a liberal who is empathetic to liberal or socialist causes, and I completely resent it. You’d think that me being gay would make me more open minded and less judgemental, but no. I'm pro-death penalty, I’m anti-immigration, I want to drop the T and I want to pull Ireland out of the EU and the UN. I used to be a bleeding heart liberal, but the events beginning in 2015 have caused me to wake up. My straight best friend is the only person who I’m completely honest with with regards to my political views, because he shares 90% of my views and on the rest we agree to disagree. And no, I’m not conservative or right wing, I’m more of an anybody-killer, like Barricade Garage.

Do you feel like it's important for you to have other gay friends or is it indifferent?

It would be nice to have another gay friend, but it’s not necessary. My best friend who is straight is the only friend I need. And I have friends from karate classes who I haven’t seen in a while but them being gay is unimportant to me. But I would like a boyfriend, but it’s not essential.

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I'm against death penalty because I think being locked up for life is worst. Although in Italy there is no such a thing as jail for life. Except if you're like Totò Riina ahah. I see american getting multiple life sentences and always awww ahah I'm anti-immigration too. Or like, I'm pro good immigration, but the entire country of Africa coming to Italy isn't good immigration. Although I kinda get why they would live their country. Like I was born in one of the best country in the world and still want to live abroad, and these people are born in super poor countries, they just want a better life, but we cannot fucking welcome the world, it would be like a racial and cultura replacement. People should be helped where they are. It's nice to see boyfriend as not essential. The fact is we cannot control relationships. They're strong preferance, but not a necessity for a content/worthy life. Happiness comes from being good by yourself. I realize that making your life depends on other people will end always badly. Stoicism has made me understand that accepting the possibility of staying alone is the only way to reach peace. Your comments are always my favorite by the way.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I’m glad you like my comments. I like your perspective on things. I’m fine with a small amount of immigrants but Irish people should make up at least 93% of Ireland’s population. I’d like for Ireland to remain Irish. And the best way to help people coming from bad countries is to help them to help themselves. And stop invading their countries. We have so many refugees from Syria, Iraq, Afghanistan and Libya coming into Europe because western governments were invading and bombing their countries.

And yes, I don’t need a boyfriend. It would be nice to have one though, but it’s necessary to love yourself and be comfortable with yourself before getting into a relationship with someone.

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Exactly. I mean isn't even about race. Skin color doesn't matter (although USA kind shows multi-racial societes are a failure, even after many years they still got a lot of tension between black and white and they got the same fucking culture, the same as south italians and north italians hating each others and we're the same race and country, people are more comfortable with similar people by nature and different population struggle to live together) but culture does. People coming from African countries, especially muslim got a totally different culture than italian and totally not compatible with us. If you put masses of people from these countries or give citizenship to anyone being born here, the country would ended being something else. Not real Italy anymore. It seems like left-fanatics want to replace european culture with third world one. It's scary. I agree about loving yourself first. I do crave a relationship, but not any relationship like people who can't stay alone and will stay in a relationship for the sake of it. I kind try to prepare myself for the possibility of a lifetime alone if I won't be lucky to get the right woman. It's hard, but I'm totally against seeing a relationship as a necessity rather than something which is good only with real mutual feelings and compatibility.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Leftist fanatics who support open borders and mass immigration do want to replace European culture. That, or their stupid enough to think these migrants want to assimilate into the culture. Most migrants come to Europe for social welfare payments, which is why they look towards Ireland, the UK, Sweden and Germany. It’s easy money and they don’t have to work. The rest of the migrants are seeking asylum, but they want to go back to their countries eventually. And those that come to Europe because they love European culture are rare, and they’re gonna leave if European culture disappears. But it’s not just left wing fanatics who support mass immigration into Europe: neoliberals and neoconservatives support it as well, because it destroys communities and it leaves people dependent on the government and on corporations. The Italians and the British are beginning to realise the importance of keeping cultures separate in order to protect them, but the Irish people are sadly not awake yet. But some of us have woken up.

It could be a long time before I’ve settled down with another man. He has to be compatible and independent, and the relationship has to be mutually beneficial for us.

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They're stupid to think they will integrate. A survey say 50 percent of muslims in Uk want gay sex illegal. You can't expect people to integrate to a culture totally opposite to their religion. USA muslims are way more progressive, because they're far less and come based on skillsets. If masses of muslim immigrants come together, they will by themselves like they were in Pakistan, and never integrate in the culture. They're supporting culture that would destroy all gain in the terms of women, gays right and general freedom of people. I like independence to. It's fundamental to respect personal space and time.

[–]oofreesouloo⚡super lesbian⚡[S] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Thank you for sharing your story and views! <3 the way you handled your homosexuality during secondary school was somehow similar too. I would "swing" between having brave days, where I would come out fearlessly and just wanted to be happy and didn't care about others, and coward days too where I suddenly panicked and didn't want anyone else to find out because I even felt it was a flaw/abnormality I had in me. It was a long slow process to fully accept my homosexuality and I'm still not 100% there. Lovely to read your story. Take care!

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thanks. Glad I’m not the only one who has experienced this. Take care as well.