LifestyleAdvice for finding an LGB partner who DOESN'T support the QT+ movement?

submitted by FartandSnap from self.LGBDropTheT

sorted by:
top
newinsightfulfun
you are viewing a single comment's thread.

view the rest of the comments →

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (9 children)

Look for conservative guys, even if they currently don't know enough (yet) to drop the T. Over time they can learn.

My husband was kind of indifferent to or even weakly supportive of TQ+ nonsense, but he grew up in the Bible Belt and his parents are very serious Christians (still sweet and very supportive of our relationship even if on paper they are not supportive of "gay marriage"). Over time (10 years) his natural conservatism has led him to agree more and more with my center-right positions.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

I second this. Conservative or right wing same-sex attracted people tend to be less supportive of TQs or at least more switched on to how bad the movement is.

There are many different kinds of conservatives. There are neoconservatives, who are just as bad as neoliberals, so avoid them. There are libertarians. There are paleoconservatives. There are traditional conservatives. There are nationalists. There are members of the far right. There are populists. And so on. Some of these conservative ideologies are more tolerant of homosexuality than others, but there is going to be at least one gay person who holds one of these ideologies. Divide your beliefs into dealbreakers and agree-to-disagrees before you make any commitment with another person.

There are liberals and moderates who oppose the TQ ideology, but they are harder to find.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Divide your beliefs into dealbreakers and agree-to-disagrees

This is an important point. Also, if you are really interested in someone, try to steer disagreements into the "agree-to-disagree" territory. Husband and I did not agree on US presidential candidates this last election cycle but we can respect each others' opinions.

If TQ+ doesn't directly impact your life I think it can go in "agree-to-disagree" bucket. For me, it would only ever become a deal-breaking issue if there were children involved, children for whom I had responsibility.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 15 insightful - 2 fun15 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

Exactly. I can agree to disagree on a lot of things. Including the President of the United States - for the record, I think that both Trump and Biden suck. I can even agree to disagree on whether or not my own (Irish) government is good, but I’m extremely vocal on how bad they are. But I have a lot of dealbreakers, including:

  • Transgender children - I’ll never date a man who’d let his minor children transition. If we have a son together and the son declares at the age of 15 that he’s non-binary or wants to become a woman, I’m taking the boy with me to Florida, where you have to be over 18 to transition. I’d even relocate to Hungary! And if we have an adult son who transitions, I’d do everything I can to talk the son out of it, even if this leads to divorce.
  • Surrogacy - I don’t mind if he’s in favour of it, but I do not want to have a child through surrogacy. If he wants kids, we’re adopting. If he wants biological children of his own, then I hope he has them from a previous relationship, because as far as I’m concerned, surrogacy is immoral.
  • Anti-Irish - if he hates Irish people, I will not be the exception to the rule. As much as I resent my own people for supporting the lockdowns, I will not tolerate a foreign man who hates Irish people, even if he’s willing to make exceptions.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 11 insightful - 3 fun11 insightful - 2 fun12 insightful - 3 fun -  (3 children)

Who hates Irish people?

Oh yeah, I live in the US, not the UK.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Most British people don’t mind us, thankfully. They do hate our government, but Irish people also hate our government, so I’m fine with that.

[–]Cass 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Black people in Ireland hate the Irish people. They claim they've been there since the dawn mankind and St Patrick killed them all so white people could come and settle. They also tried to have their own violent blm protests after some violent black druggie was killed by the police recently, after he attacked the police and they tried to use other means to subdue him.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They also tried to have their own violent blm protests after some violent black druggie was killed by the police recently

Deja vu...

[–]GayBoner 12 insightful - 2 fun12 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Lol ew no

There are plenty of liberal gay guys who don’t buy into the TQ+

[–][deleted] 12 insightful - 2 fun12 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Agreed lol, just because I want a non TRA partner doesn't mean that I'd run to the first rightoid man. Conservative gays can be self-hating