ColonizationBut wait, don’t they keep telling us having a genital preference is “valid”?

submitted by ChunkeeguyTeam T*RF Fuck Yeah from vice.com

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[–]Femaleisnthateful 30 insightful - 4 fun30 insightful - 3 fun31 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

God these people are exhausing.

"I'm a masculine presenting person using an app for gay men. Why do people keep misgendering me as a male?"

[–]julesburm1891 31 insightful - 1 fun31 insightful - 0 fun32 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

For non-binary people, though, dating apps—which are often designed around the gender binary—can be complicated, and sometimes even downright exhausting.

Then don’t use them or make your own.

[–]PatsyStoneMaverique 30 insightful - 3 fun30 insightful - 2 fun31 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

  1. Dating apps aren't a civil right.

  2. If you've artificially introduced hardships into your life because you didn't have any naturally, isn't being misunderstood what you wanted?

  3. Those 90s headkerchief things are back.

[–]Uranian 23 insightful - 10 fun23 insightful - 9 fun24 insightful - 10 fun -  (0 children)

Why would anyone want to fuck someone who is so exhausting to read about let alone be in the company of? Plus - fugly

[–][deleted] 24 insightful - 3 fun24 insightful - 2 fun25 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

I'm all for dating apps having a non-binary section where you only see non-binary if you include them in the search. But somehow I doubt non-binary people would actually like that since they'd get basically no matches since very few people would include them.

[–]julesburm1891 22 insightful - 2 fun22 insightful - 1 fun23 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

That seems to be the trans and non-binary MO: insist on showing yourself to people who categorically aren’t interested and throwing a tantrum instead of just going after people who are interested.

[–]ArthnoldManacatsaman🇬🇧🌳🟦 18 insightful - 4 fun18 insightful - 3 fun19 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Narcissism is a vice, is it not?

[–]JulienMayfair 15 insightful - 2 fun15 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

The extra considerations non-binary people need to take in order to use platforms that aren’t designed for them can be exhausting.

Fixed that for you:

The extra considerations non-binary people need can be exhausting.

And, as the old saying goes, don't stick your dick in crazy.

[–]usehername 13 insightful - 2 fun13 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

A minefield? There wasn't a single mention of violence. Looks like they have to face the possibility of being rejected or referred to by pronouns they don't prefer.

I’ve personally had negative experiences on Grindr, too. I state in my bio that I identify as non-binary, but still receive a lot of messages starting with “Hey, man”.

Under U.K. law, this can be considered a hate incident.

When two in five non-binary people have experienced a hate crime or incident in the space of a year, these threats can feel very real.

Sounds horrific, right? This stat is only in the U.K., which loosely defines a "hate crime" as follows https://www.cps.gov.uk/crime-info/hate-crime :

"Any criminal offence which is perceived by the victim or any other person, to be motivated by hostility or prejudice, based on a person's disability or perceived disability; race or perceived race; or religion or perceived religion; or sexual orientation or perceived sexual orientation or transgender identity or perceived transgender identity."

So what separates a crime from any other crime is whether the victim believes the crime was motivated by hostility or prejudice based on a protected characteristic. But then we take a look at the source they linked, which actually says:

Two in five trans people (41 per cent) have experienced a hate crime or incident because of their gender identity in the last 12 months and one in six LGB people, who aren’t trans (16 per cent), have experienced a hate crime or incident due to their sexual orientation in the same period.

  1. They are taking the number for all hate crimes or incidents (this is important, we'll come back to it) faced by all trans people and saying it's the number for non-binary. ALSO they claimed it was hate crimes, when the source actually references "hate crimes or incident". So what is a hate incident?

They say something is a hate incident if the victim or anyone else think it was motivated by hostility or prejudice based on a protected characteristic.

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/law-and-courts/discrimination/hate-crime/what-are-hate-incidents-and-hate-crime/

Hate incidents can take many forms. Here are examples of hate incidents:

verbal abuse like name-calling and offensive jokes
harassment
bullying or intimidation by children, adults, neighbours or strangers
physical attacks such as hitting, punching, pushing, spitting
threats of violence
hoax calls, abusive phone or text messages, hate mail
online abuse for example on Facebook or Twitter
displaying or circulating discriminatory literature or posters
harm or damage to things such as your home, pet, vehicle
graffiti
arson
throwing rubbish into a garden
malicious complaints for example over parking, smells or noise.

So when they claim "two in five nonbinary people have been the victim of a hate crime", what they really mean is:

In the U.K., two in five people who identify as transgender have read a mean tweet online.

[–]Alma_Esmeraude 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

These people are so self-absorbed, they'll never realize they are the source of their troubles and a vortex of drama that most people will not touch.

...But nah, it's just because they're "non-binary" or "trans" or whatever.....

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries" 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

This is lunacy. How anyone can write or reach this article and feel one iota of sympathy for these narcissists is beyond me. You are not entitled to be in anyone’s dating pool. This is entire article is about how they can break down others’ barriers and get forcibly considered by them. Getting reported for “no reason?” I’d like to hear the reasons given by those who reported them. 2/5 non-binary people have experienced “hate crimes or incidents” in the past year. We all know that just means not being consistently called “they” by literally everyone. How many times did they commit “hate crimes or incidents” against Christians this year by taking the lord’s name in vein or publicly proclaiming themselves atheists?

[–]DimDroog 10 insightful - 2 fun10 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Imagine inventing problems in order to feel like a victim.

I loath these navel gazing pinheads.

[–]Rosefield 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

“At the moment, we are working on building a refreshed matching experience that will create a more inclusive, enjoyable and safe experience that will ultimately lead to meaningful relationships.”

LMAO sure. They are going to fuck Hinge up and hopefully lose a huge percentage of members because catering to 0,01% of your members is a bad idea.

[–]Rag3 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Anybody else start to say “I don’t care" whenever you read about NB dating in headlines? No one is entitled to dates or apps. Make your own.

[–]powpowpowpow 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You know what I find interesting?

Is that they never attempt to create THEIR own spaces, they always want other to adapt to them and if people tell them no they will say "well, they go ahead and make your own space!"

And the cycle repeats... wtf is up with that?