Chit-ChatSunday Social - open chat!

submitted by NutterButterFlutterStill waving into the void[M] from self.LGBDropTheT

In-between moments of righteous activism, we all have lives we attend to. What did you do last week, or what are your plans this week? Watching any good movies or shows? Go on any dates? Struggling with, or achieved, any major life goals? Survive any alien invasions?  

Do you want to promote a new sub, or discuss topics that otherwise get removed? Do you want to introduce yourself, but are feeling too shy to make your own post?  

Feel free to share here!  

NOTE: our Rules are relaxed, but not gone entirely. Be excellent to each other!

all 20 comments
sorted by:
top
newinsightfulfun

[–]reluctant_commenter 16 insightful - 2 fun16 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Oh hey, these are started again!

Okay I have to ask. I've gotten kind of swamped at work but am still interested in starting two potential subs:

I was thinking the latter, s/LGBmemes, would be more of a trans-free zone, so like no memes about dropping the T, just memes/jokes about being same-sex-attracted. Currently trying to build a stash of content to post, but since I'm lesbian most of my posts would be about that so I'd love to see stuff from gay men and bisexuals, too :)

  1. Anyone else interested in joining either of these?

  2. Does anyone want to mod-- or at the very least, be a backup mod even if you don't want to do very much? (Was going to message the s/LGBdroptheT mods about it as well.)

  3. Any suggestions or ideas about these subs? I am in the process of building a set of guidelines, heavily drawn from s/lgbdropthet rules.

[–]IcomeinpeaceHomosexual Transsexual | Biologically Female | Anti-uwu brigade 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

This post recently got removed, maybe a discussion can start here? This is it:

I've recently stumbled across this space and thought that a discussion like this would be productive as well as being the only place where uncensored discourse would be allowed. I'm not going to try to change your opinions and I'd appreciate it if you didn't go into this with the aim of converting me, I'm just hoping that a discussion like this can be productive in getting to know each others perspectives. Basically, civility and respect, or however much of either can be expected on the Internet. I'm not sure if this sort of post is allowed but I want to assert that this post isn't intended to spark arguments, isn't trolling and isn't an effort to create conflict of any sort. It's simply, hopefully, an opportunity to focus less on hate for a moment and try to understand each other.

A little about me:

-I am 29 years old and I was born female. I am still female, and that is my biological reality. However I identify as a man.

-I identify as a man because of strong and overwhelming sex dysphoria which lead me to develop a life threatening eating disorder aged 13 in an attempt to stop the feminisation of my body. I was hospitalised twice for this, both because of getting down to very low and unstable weights, before the root of my issues was finally addressed with psychiatric intervention.

-I have medically transitioned in all ways but a phalloplasty, which I intend to also get some day. I have paid for almost all costs out of pocket, including hormones.

-I am homosexual because I am exclusively attracted to females and, biologically, I am a female. However because of my trans status most homosexual females won't date me, and I don't believe that straight women should try to date me either. As a result I've stayed mostly single apart from one long term relationship with a bisexual woman.

-I don't care if you misgender me but I'm very grateful and appreciate it if you don't. Any pronoun is fine during this discussion because I'm secure enough in my identify to not need validation from Internet strangers :P

Any questions? Feel free to ask!

[–]reluctant_commenter 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Hey-- I didn't see your post get removed, but you don't even have to be homosexual/bisexual to post or comment on this sub, allies and heterosexual/asexual people can, too! The only requirement is that posts be on-topic. I have seen a couple other transsexuals floating around here as well.

I kind of think there should be a s/askLGBdroptheT or something for these types of posts; s/lgbdropthet moved to Saidit but has yet to flesh out a full ecosystem of sibling subsaidits and whatnot. Or possibly a s/LGBdebatesQT or something (s/GCdebatesQT is different, many of us on this sub are not GC or radfem). Do you think there are other TQ-identified people interested in having a conversation as well, or were you just curious for yourself?

Wish you well. I am against transgender ideology in any of its forms, including even for homosexual transsexual (HSTS) people who want to transition, but I do respect the right of any adult to follow their own belief system as long as they are not pushing it on others and are not harming others.

[–]IcomeinpeaceHomosexual Transsexual | Biologically Female | Anti-uwu brigade 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I think there are certainly other transsexuals out there interested in an honest discussion, however the trenders and non-binaries? Not so much. They are not willing to challenge their own thinking in a respectful discussion, which really goes to show how young that demographic skews. They're incapable of rational and adult discourse because they are neither rational nor adults. I'm personally sick of them being the face of the T, I personally also believe in dropping the T because we have nothing in common. This is a lifestyle choice and I don't need any new rights, only the same rights as anyone else and the right to not be persecuted or discriminated against because of my transsexual status in employment and other areas. Laws should not be put in place to make a world which triggers my dysphoria in the least possible way because my dysphoria is my own responsibility, I genuinely just want to be left alone.

[–]reluctant_commenter 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think there are certainly other transsexuals out there interested in an honest discussion, however the trenders and non-binaries? Not so much.

Gotcha, that's good to know. I have seen a few over on s/GCdebatesQT as well.

This is a lifestyle choice and I don't need any new rights, only the same rights as anyone else and the right to not be persecuted or discriminated against because of my transsexual status in employment and other areas. Laws should not be put in place to make a world which triggers my dysphoria in the least possible way because my dysphoria is my own responsibility, I genuinely just want to be left alone.

Well, that's pretty clear-cut and consistent, fair enough.

Like I said, I am ultimately against trans ideology in any form, and a lot of other people here are as well. (I think it's roughly 50/50 or maybe 33/67 between pro-transsexual and anti-transsexual, on this sub.) So you might get some pushback here, fair warning. I respect your coming onto this sub to engage in dialogue, though, that's really the only way to move forward. Maybe I will see you around. :)

edit: Also I very much agree @ kids being a big driver of discussion about transgenderism. Reading about all of this has made me way more of a proponent of putting limits/controls on how much internet access kids have... simply from a safety perspective, it's a massively neglected topic.

[–]julesburm1891 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I’m pretty sure everyone on this sub would accept you. If the trans community held your views, we wouldn’t be here. Our problem lies with trans people who pretend sex doesn’t have real consequences, steamroll past boundaries, try to redefine sexual orientation, rewrite LGB history, and harass/doxx/scream at people in lieu of discussion. People who have sex dysphoria and really just want to go about their business? We’re cool with them.

[–]IcomeinpeaceHomosexual Transsexual | Biologically Female | Anti-uwu brigade 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm happy to hear that! If I'm being honest, I've never faced any sort of real discrimination for being trans. I have, however, faced a LOT of discrimination for being exclusively female attracted. The whole trans movement is a joke - transphobia isn't real, it is either homophobia or misogyny or both.

[–]reluctant_commenter 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I'm pretty sure everyone on this sub would accept you. If the trans community held your views, we wouldn’t be here.

Yyyyeah, I'm not sure either of those statements are true, there are a lot of people I've talked to on this sub who are concerned about the harms of transitioning in any form, even for HSTS people.

[–]julesburm1891 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I mean, RC, this is saidit. So, there’s a fair amount of hardline people in general. But, you’re right. I should’ve qualified with most not everyone.

[–]reluctant_commenter 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I guess that's pretty true of saidit, you're right lol. I forget that sometimes. Maybe I am overstating it, but I feel like I've seen a lot of hesitance towards the "truscum"/transmedicalist camp that makes me wonder otherwise. Sorry to be a wet blanket lol, I appreciate your being welcoming towards Icomeinpeace!

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

-I am 29 years old and I was born female. I am still female, and that is my biological reality.

Honestly, that's good enough for me. If all trans people stopped here, this sub probably wouldn't even exist.

I had (have really, it never goes away but it's under control now) anorexia too. I wanted to just be like a sexless stick-insect, no boobs, no hips, no secondary sex characteristics. For me it wasn't dysphoria but abuse that I'm not comfortable elaborating about. I just felt safer not looking womanly.

Anyway, I'm assuming you're here because you're sick of the gender people and the autogynephiles and all the others who are ruining the T as well? If you want to rant about them, I'd love to hear it. It's different sitting here as a bisexual woman trying to imagine how real Trans people feel about these other people, versus an actual Trans person sharing how they feel.

[–]IcomeinpeaceHomosexual Transsexual | Biologically Female | Anti-uwu brigade 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I might make a post putting together my take on the current community if people want to hear it? I am worried about overstepping because I don't want anyone to feel like their space is being invaded, since from what I can see it doubles as an LGB refuge as well as a way of dropping the T. I'm definitely sick to death of just heterosexual transgenders in general, from my personal experience I've never met a single one of them who wasn't a fetishist of some sort. They do not have genuine dysphoria. As a result I cling to the word transsexual, although I am not literally changing into the opposite sex since that is impossible, it gives it a medicalised authority which seperates me from the trenders. I think the T should be dropped even if the community was only homosexual transsexuals anyway though, because homosexuality is already covered in the L or the G, it simply isn't necessary.

[–]oyasuminasai50 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

what did everyone do today? :)

[–]reluctant_commenter 11 insightful - 4 fun11 insightful - 3 fun12 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Spent like three hours trying to get access to a research article. I finally found a way around the paywalls and now I don't have the energy to read it, haha.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Went for a walk around town with my friend, and in the evening my family and I had pizza.

[–]reluctant_commenter 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

What do you like on pizza usually?

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Pepperoni, but sometimes I mix it up. Today I had BBQ sauce, chicken, red onion and green peppers. Last time I had tomato sauce, pepperoni, crispy bacon, chicken and ham.

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I'll be honest it REALLY freaks me out when normies get super-emotional about JK Rowling and use the word TERF. It's obvious neither the mother nor the daughter actually know what JK Rowling said, but it doesn't stop them from being ignorant drama queens about it. I fear that even though JKR peaked some people, she just confused the fuck out of most people (the type that are too lazy to research and think for themselves) and pushed them further into TRA's arms.

The post in question:

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/luv7nz/aita_for_storming_out_of_my_birthday_party/

[–]reluctant_commenter 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

To be fair, though, it looks like this isn't just a "T**F" thing for the OP:

My mom has always made my birthday parties Harry Potter themed, to the point where it's embarrassing now and my friends make fun of it, but thankfully not in a bad way; they've always been good about getting me gifts that I actually want, and will usually take me out for Starbucks and a pedicure after my mom is done making us all cringe for an afternoon.

Sounds like his/her mom has been doing this for years... I would probably storm out too, trans debate or no. That sounds really frustrating.

Edit: This is actually nuts, the mom named her kid Hermione and then has forced her to have a Harry Potter themed birthday every year she's been alive? I mean I believe it's possible, that's some classic narcissist behavior on the mom's part. I hope it's fake for OP's sake, though...

[–]PeakingPeachEaterfemale♀ | detrans🦎 | eater of peaches 🍑 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Been tired and stressed out lately, working 13hrs+ of overtime and 7 days a week...Taking a break from that this week and going easy. New job has been a bit overwhelming, a lot of people couldn't be bothered to help at this job and can be rude. I usually pick up things fast but man their resource guide they make is terrible to use, so I have to ask many questions.

I want to go back into the tech field instead of this crap... there's other departments that are more chill, I may do that or look for completely different job. Don't know yet.