I'm going to say it, the stupidity you see on Reddit for example like "lesbians wear flannels and snapbacks" is on the same level of bullshit as religious groups which force it's believers to dress a certain way.

submitted by MatthewofHouseGraySuper straight ally :) from self.LGBDropTheT

I don't care that if they're serious or not, there are people out there who are having a hard to coming to terms with their sexuality so these people are going to think that they have to dress a certain way to fit in when they see a bunch of people on the "actuallesbians" sub for example who are dressing as the stereotype. Obviously these people aren't being forced to do so and it's their own choice, but they are in mindset where they actually think that they have to dress like that so they can be accepted amongst the sexuality they identify as and in order to accept themselves.

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[–]julesburm1891 15 insightful - 2 fun15 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

The fact that a straight man with no skin in the game is more indignant over unfair and prejudiced stereotyping than any so called “queer” people really tells you everything you need to know about the LGBTQ+ community.

[–]ChodeSandwichtender and moist 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I think it's another symptom from the all-encompassing backdrop of body mistrust in conventional Western society. Some people can't tell the difference between appetite, habit, and actual hunger. Some people ignore their doctors and their own body's warning signs until it's too late. And then there are some people who grope for external, concrete proof of their sexuality no matter how stupid, offensive, or backwards it is.

[–]reluctant_commenter 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

COMPLETELY agree. I think many people who describe themselves as being a certain sexuality-- particularly kids, people with a mental disorder (e.g. PTSD, ASD) that makes it difficult to observe how they feel in their body, and people trying to hop on the alternative "queer community" trend-- try to justify to themselves that they are X sexuality out of a mistaken belief that people with X sexuality dress or look or behave a certain way. Not only are they neglecting to notice own bodily experiences, they are perpetrating harmful stereotypes.

edit: typo

[–]ChodeSandwichtender and moist 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Manipulative TRAs and ""sex positivity"" don't help. They teach people to clench their jaws and work through whatever sex act is being asked of them because every bad feeling ever is just bigotry or being a prude or trauma responses to be fixed (unless you decide to ""cope"" with trauma by re-enacting it through a BDSM lens over and over, then suddenly it's valid and healthy.) It's disgusting.

[–]EzukiRaen 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They may not be forced to do anything but, neither are people in cults. They end up brainwashed and do harmful things (because they think they're doing good) and they don't ever really realize the impact of what they do until something significant happens to them (usually when they get burned by the group).

In my opinion, the "actuallesbians" sub is a cult as well as the woke left.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/belief/2009/may/27/cults-definition-religion

The Guardian isn't the best source in the world -- they have a left bias and mixed reporting on factual news vs fake news -- however, this article gives a very good description on the modern usage of the word "cult"; "actuallesbians" (and the woke left) fit the points to a tee.

[–]reluctant_commenter 8 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I agree, it's super harmful. Both to the LGB people who might feel pressured to pick up these trends in order to feel accepted, as well as to the LGB community as a whole because of stereotypes. The idea that a lesbian, gay, or bisexual person has to look a certain way or act a certain way is regressive and bigoted.

Will say for the record though, I've always loved plaid and did long before I realized that I was into women and not men. I don't wear it as a "uniform" though, I just happen to like it. They copied me, not the other way around hahaha.

[–]oofreesouloo⚡super lesbian⚡ 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

THANK YOU SO MUCH. We're regressing in so many ways it's scary

[–]OPPRESSED_REPTILIANIntersex male | GNC | Don't call me "a gay", "twink" or "queen" 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I hate going to music subreddits and seeing shit like "SKSKSKSKKS you stan (female musician) ur such a bottom!" or "ARE YOU EVEN GAY IF YOU DON'T (do something that's irrelevant to homosexuality)?!?"

It's fucking infuriating. I don't do pretty much anything associated with being gay, so am I straight now?

[–]reluctant_commenter 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah I agree, that stuff is really annoying. For example the "queer community" has the stereotype about lesbians: "If you want to know if she's a lesbian then just ask, Does she listens to Girl in Red??" Like, no, I don't listen to every random fucking artist who has a song about being a woman who's into women.

[–]LeaveAmsgAfterBeep 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Its funny because I’ve felt less accepted for wearing these things among other lesbians, and have found those in my area are primarily super feminine and make fun of any lesbian who isn’t. It’s not like I came out yesterday either.

They want to claim to be revolutionary but they want to turn what we like to wear into a uniform and I hate that, because for them its never been about being themselves like it is for those who simply enjoy these types of clothing (flannel is comfy and warm, lol)

[–]sadbihours 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

These new kids entire identities are stereotypes nowadays and it’s nauseating.

[–]blahblahgcer 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Right now it's a trend on tiktok to come out as bisexual by rolling up your pant legs. Everyone is supposed to automatically know what that means. Wtf?