Askgaybros uwu thread #11828828276

submitted by [deleted] from (reddit.com)

sorted by:
top
newinsightfulfun
you are viewing a single comment's thread.

view the rest of the comments →

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 28 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 0 fun29 insightful - 1 fun -  (8 children)

I have a slightly different perspective on all this.

Nobody is seriously proposing woque-style conversion therapy (at least not yet), notwithstanding an insistence that we "seriously examine our socially determined preferences" or whatever that crap is. On our end, almost all consequences of FtM uwu can be avoided simply by limiting any meaningful social contact with FtMs, which shouldn't be difficult.

Who I am really concerned about is the FtM's themselves. They are signing themselves up for a lifetime of rejection (recall that story about the FtM who ended up crying in the bathroom of an orgy because nobody saw her as a real man), not to mention serious medical problems, all for some stupid fantasy that can easily be worked around by dating some metrosexual straight guy who would be happy to have them.

I really feel bad for these women in spite of their obnoxiousness.

[–]CaptainMooseEx-Bathhouse Employee 20 insightful - 3 fun20 insightful - 2 fun21 insightful - 3 fun -  (7 children)

On our end, almost all consequences of FtM uwu can be avoided simply by limiting any meaningful social contact with FtMs, which shouldn't be difficult.

I feel that this is much easier on paper than it is in practice. It isn't just FtMs whose harassment and sexual misconduct/assault/battery we have to worry about; it's also anyone who sips the TRA juice and white knights for them. If you have one gay bar in a metro area and the FtMs and their enablers make it hostile to you, you're going to have an even harder time finding a partner.

all for some stupid fantasy that can easily be worked around by dating some metrosexual straight guy who would be happy to have them.

Given how greasy most FtMs look, I doubt a metrosexual straight guy would want to touch them with a 10ft pole. They're more likely to pursue normie, mentally healthy straight girls.

I really feel bad for these women in spite of their obnoxiousness.

I don't. As much as some people look at them like modern day emo kids, I view them more like the creepy girls who dated closeted guys.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

If you have one gay bar in a metro area and the FtMs

I haven't in over a decade so maybe I'm out of touch. But it really should be a simple matter of saying "no". You don't owe anybody any explanation for why you're not attracted to them, and you can make anything up if you want. I do understand that for lesbians avoiding MtFs it's a little trickier because of the potential threat of violence.

I view them more like the creepy girls who dated closeted guys.

I guarantee you they are suffering far more than any gay guy who has to put up with their creepiness for a few minutes every so often. We can eventually excuse ourselves ans walk away. They have to live in the hell of their own making.

[–]GoValidateYourselfuseful lesbian 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Iridescent it's not just the threat of male violence for lesbians. It's the fact that MtF "lesbians" literally outnumber actual, female lesbians b/c there are more straight men with fetishes than lesbians (go figure). On fb 4 of my guy friends in the last 3 years came out as trans and "lesbians". Out of 200 friends. This doesn't seem like much, but for comparison I only know one other lesbian on there, and 1 bisexual woman.

In my irl lgbtq+ society years ago there were way more trans people (women and men) and no lesbians. There was a small handful of "queer" women and nonbinary/agender females (including me) none of whom called themselves lesbians at the time.

Keep in mind this outnumbering when you hear about MTFs shutting down lesbian events, bars, etc. It is not a small number, and we can't just avoid them.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

To clarify: I see FtM's as mostly sad (though obnoxious). However, I see MtF's as potentially dangerous.

Yeah, maybe I'm a bit sexist in seeing biological men as inherently much more dangerous than biological women.

[–]GoValidateYourselfuseful lesbian 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I don't think you are sexist, just realistic. Men are usually stronger, larger, and more powerful than women. So dudes with transgender fetish for lesbians is more of a physical threat that FtMs for gay men.

I don't feel bad for them anymore. I used to, but after so many years of giving my friendship, time, energy, and activism, and it being taken for granted, I ran out of tears. I have zero sympathy for them or their malafide movement now.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I don't feel bad for them anymore. I used to, but after so many years of giving my friendship, time, energy, and activism, and it being taken for granted, I ran out of tears. I have zero sympathy for them or their malafide movement now.

There's a difference between compassion and giving undeserved resources. I think there's a lesson in some of this, one about boundaries. I can have compassion for somebody while still refusing to give them any undeserved emotional energy to continue on their destructive (both to self and other) behavior. I can see them as victims of a larger sinister process while still holding them accountable for feeding that process. That's really all I'm saying.

Honestly, I think these people should be shunned. But when some of them decide to de-transition (as some of them inevitably will) they should be treated with the compassion and empathy they will deserve at that point.

[–]CaptainMooseEx-Bathhouse Employee 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

But it really should be a simple matter of saying "no". You don't owe anybody any explanation for why you're not attracted to them, and you can make anything up if you want. I do understand that for lesbians avoiding MtFs it's a little trickier because of the potential threat of violence.

It should, but it isn't. The threat of violence is still there. Even with normie straight girls in gay bars, they get aggressive when in groups and told to fuck off and keep their hands to themselves and start decrying you as sexist for having boundaries.

You can excuse yourself, but it won't prevent stalkers and their enablers.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Maybe so. I haven't been in a gay bar in almost a decade so I suppose things may have changed.

I still stand by the statement that their lives are miserable and that they are (also) victims of a sinister agenda.