DiscussionWas anyone else here previously a TRA?

submitted by zerosis from self.LGBDropTheT

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[–]zerosis[S] 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

You're right, there are some positives and I should try to focus on those! I really believe that a huge legal scandal is coming in a few years when these trans kids come of age, and it's going to be a tragic mess that will be fun for absolutely no-one. To be honest I'm really just grieving my community. I feel like I really don't have one anymore, and that's a rough place to be. Knowing that there are many other gay/bi people who at best hate me and at worst would probably be happy to see me in front of a firing squad (though I know that's probably just hyperbole when I see it) for advocating for homosexuality and women's rights just feels... surreal and distressing.

[–]reluctant_commenter 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I feel like I really don't have one anymore, and that's a rough place to be. Knowing that there are many other gay/bi people who at best hate me and at worst would probably be happy to see me in front of a firing squad (though I know that's probably just hyperbole when I see it) for advocating for homosexuality and women's rights just feels... surreal and distressing.

...Yeah. Same here. Seeing my former classmates and my peers say this stuff really makes me feel alienated. Sometimes I feel like I'm crazy, for being bothered by it; TRAs say stuff like, "Oh, it's just the internet, only a tiny amount of people say X" (X being "not wanting to suck dick is transphobic," etc.), but I absolutely know people who are hostile and bully others over that stuff, IRL. I haven't seen it start an actual physical fight but yelling, verbal aggression, and spreading rumors about the "problematic" person afterwards-- absolutely.

Sorry, now I'm being negative, haha. Point is, I feel you, I guess, and if I'm too scared to even bring up this subject with people, I'm certain that others must be, too. I try to find kind people who have thoughtful views on other subjects, and don't have a general tribalism mentality.

[–]zerosis[S] 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

TRAs say stuff like, "Oh, it's just the internet, only a tiny amount of people say X"

Oh yeah, I hear this kind of thing a lot, but I swear to god every single one of my friend groups has been directly affected and split apart by this. Whenever I hear 'it's just on twitter/reddit' I feel like someone's trying to tell me to ignore the bushfire that's a couple miles away while I'm currently being choked out by the smoke cloud. If I was outspoken about my beliefs IRL, I could be in serious financial and even personal danger.

But we should take solace in the fact that there ARE people waking up from this, and that's not going to stop happening, ever! Honestly, when you get down to it, because we are a sexually dimorphic species, TRA ideology can never fully take hold over a human civilization. You can't 'educate' away people's heterosexuality or homosexuality. There will always be new people being born, people who will reject the notion of being told what they should be attracted to and who they should love, people who will love their bodies as they naturally are and who won't surgically or horomonally alter themselves because they don't fit into prescribed gender roles, people who will know that biological sex is a beautiful and real part of the human experience that has tangible effects on the lives of women and men. Our situation feels dire right now, but that's just a feeling, not reality. Like, TRA's might as well be trying to convince everyone the sky is green. They might change the definition of 'green' to mean what 'blue' used to stand for, but reality is still there, reality still works, reality doesn't bother with our definitions or ideals. I don't know if this is even making sense, haha, but that kind of helps me stay grounded these days.

[–]reluctant_commenter 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Our situation feels dire right now, but that's just a feeling, not reality. Like, TRA's might as well be trying to convince everyone the sky is green. They might change the definition of 'green' to mean what 'blue' used to stand for, but reality is still there, reality still works, reality doesn't bother with our definitions or ideals. I don't know if this is even making sense, haha, but that kind of helps me stay grounded these days.

It makes perfect sense!! Funny, that sentiment, especially the first sentence, is something I often try to keep in mind when it comes to trauma flashbacks...

I am too exhausted to form much of a coherent reply right now, other than to say I completely agree. The objective truth wins out in the long-run. Thank god for that. :)