DiscussionWas anyone else here previously a TRA?

submitted by zerosis from self.LGBDropTheT

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[–]reluctant_commenter 31 insightful - 1 fun31 insightful - 0 fun32 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

Hey-- just wanted to say, I also often get discouraged by how negative things seem, too. But here's some positives:

  • JK Rowling making her "manifesto" about transing children and sticking to her guns, which has peaked a LOT of people.

  • The U.K. starting to turn around on gender ideology-- stuff like BBC removing Mermaids from its suggested pages, the Tavistock gender clinic under investigation, and the court case that's currently in progress with the detrans woman.

  • This sub as a place to talk about it all :)

  • (For us Americanz) The fact that the U.S. is such a sue-happy country. Seriously, people sue each other left and right over the the smallest things, you can bet anything that people will sue over the extensive and life-long damage being caused by all the trans medications and surgeries.

It might take a few years but this thing WILL get turned around, I promise you. It's a travesty. It's awful, it really is, the whole thing. But it WILL pass.

I'm afraid that I'm not going to be able to meet any other gay men who haven't bought into this shit.

I feel you. I don't know many people period, let alone other lesbian/bisexual women, who are not drinking the koolaid. But, I used to drink the koolaid myself and I woke up. Other people will, too. :)

[–]zerosis[S] 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

You're right, there are some positives and I should try to focus on those! I really believe that a huge legal scandal is coming in a few years when these trans kids come of age, and it's going to be a tragic mess that will be fun for absolutely no-one. To be honest I'm really just grieving my community. I feel like I really don't have one anymore, and that's a rough place to be. Knowing that there are many other gay/bi people who at best hate me and at worst would probably be happy to see me in front of a firing squad (though I know that's probably just hyperbole when I see it) for advocating for homosexuality and women's rights just feels... surreal and distressing.

[–]reluctant_commenter 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I feel like I really don't have one anymore, and that's a rough place to be. Knowing that there are many other gay/bi people who at best hate me and at worst would probably be happy to see me in front of a firing squad (though I know that's probably just hyperbole when I see it) for advocating for homosexuality and women's rights just feels... surreal and distressing.

...Yeah. Same here. Seeing my former classmates and my peers say this stuff really makes me feel alienated. Sometimes I feel like I'm crazy, for being bothered by it; TRAs say stuff like, "Oh, it's just the internet, only a tiny amount of people say X" (X being "not wanting to suck dick is transphobic," etc.), but I absolutely know people who are hostile and bully others over that stuff, IRL. I haven't seen it start an actual physical fight but yelling, verbal aggression, and spreading rumors about the "problematic" person afterwards-- absolutely.

Sorry, now I'm being negative, haha. Point is, I feel you, I guess, and if I'm too scared to even bring up this subject with people, I'm certain that others must be, too. I try to find kind people who have thoughtful views on other subjects, and don't have a general tribalism mentality.

[–]zerosis[S] 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

TRAs say stuff like, "Oh, it's just the internet, only a tiny amount of people say X"

Oh yeah, I hear this kind of thing a lot, but I swear to god every single one of my friend groups has been directly affected and split apart by this. Whenever I hear 'it's just on twitter/reddit' I feel like someone's trying to tell me to ignore the bushfire that's a couple miles away while I'm currently being choked out by the smoke cloud. If I was outspoken about my beliefs IRL, I could be in serious financial and even personal danger.

But we should take solace in the fact that there ARE people waking up from this, and that's not going to stop happening, ever! Honestly, when you get down to it, because we are a sexually dimorphic species, TRA ideology can never fully take hold over a human civilization. You can't 'educate' away people's heterosexuality or homosexuality. There will always be new people being born, people who will reject the notion of being told what they should be attracted to and who they should love, people who will love their bodies as they naturally are and who won't surgically or horomonally alter themselves because they don't fit into prescribed gender roles, people who will know that biological sex is a beautiful and real part of the human experience that has tangible effects on the lives of women and men. Our situation feels dire right now, but that's just a feeling, not reality. Like, TRA's might as well be trying to convince everyone the sky is green. They might change the definition of 'green' to mean what 'blue' used to stand for, but reality is still there, reality still works, reality doesn't bother with our definitions or ideals. I don't know if this is even making sense, haha, but that kind of helps me stay grounded these days.

[–]reluctant_commenter 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Our situation feels dire right now, but that's just a feeling, not reality. Like, TRA's might as well be trying to convince everyone the sky is green. They might change the definition of 'green' to mean what 'blue' used to stand for, but reality is still there, reality still works, reality doesn't bother with our definitions or ideals. I don't know if this is even making sense, haha, but that kind of helps me stay grounded these days.

It makes perfect sense!! Funny, that sentiment, especially the first sentence, is something I often try to keep in mind when it comes to trauma flashbacks...

I am too exhausted to form much of a coherent reply right now, other than to say I completely agree. The objective truth wins out in the long-run. Thank god for that. :)

[–]PenseePansyBio-Sex or Bust 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Wish I had more upvotes to give this!

These days, especially with our own people falling all over themselves to compliment the Trans Emperor's new clothes... we can easily forget that there ARE some hopeful signs. Thanks so much for the reminder; I, at least, need all the encouragement that I can get! (Glad that you weren't too reluctant to comment!)

And thank the gods-- or, rather, the mods-- for this sub, too (what with all the fatwas issued against it by gender-jihadis). I really feel like we're a repository of wisdom here, ensuring that it survives this fucking barbarian invasion. LGBDropTheT = Library of Alexandria?

[–]reluctant_commenter 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Awh, thanks :) of course!! I think there is always hope when one is doing the best they can. Objective reality always wins out in the long run, it just takes time for some people's denial to catch up to them.

(Glad that you weren't too reluctant to comment!)

Haha, I am often reluctant but I have the name because I thought this account would be a throwaway when I first commented on s/lesbians-- and I was initially nervous to comment, in fact, because of all the things I had heard about the Mean Nasty Terfs from TRAs. Go figure :)

I really feel like we're a repository of wisdom here, ensuring that it survives this fucking barbarian invasion. LGBDropTheT = Library of Alexandria?

Hahaha, yeah it is definitely nice to have this place! I do feel like it'll be an interesting thing to look back on, too-- "What were the LGB people doing during all of the woke conversion therapy in the 2010s-2020s?" Yeah, we were here, all right.