I don't think you're going to change your mind, so I'm gonna make this my last post.

Basically, what you're saying is not my personal experience. I misidentified my lesbianism as asexuality because they do have something important and fundamental in common. I realized I wasn't interested in boys a decade before I realized I liked girls. It was the "abnormal" part; it what stood out. My interest in girls slipped under the radar, given the pseudo-romantic nature of female friendships, but I had no explanation for my lack of crushes on boys. It's common enough to hear "I thought I was bi for a while before I realized I'm gay", but the inverse version of "I thought I was ace before I realized I'm gay" is not unique to me—I've since heard it from multiple other people as well.

There is definitely a lot about asexuals that is completely different from anyone else. They have major questions to face about what a life not based around central romantic partnerships looks like, and they don't have that in common with any other sexuality. I'm doubt there's really be much to be gained from an alliance between them and gay and bi folk—one more reason that I'm not advocating for it.

But homosexuals and asexuals do have one major thing in common, and I think there's room for understanding between us around this shared experience. If there's no understanding to be had between you and them, that's ok. But between me and them there is. At the very least, we'll always share Artemis.