you are viewing a single comment's thread.

view the rest of the comments →

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Heteronormative. I just recently started using it, but I don't want to be using any "kweer" words if I can help it, I didn't realize they were tied together! Is there a better word I can use to get across the same meaning? (Like being tricked by society to feel like boy+girl is the only option and there are no other options?) Thanks for giving me the head's up!

[–]BiHorror 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

As far as i know, not really, and the shitty thing is that term had potential but the coiner of it was apart of the queer theory creations. From I know, compulsory heterosexuality could be used (that's what heteronormativity based on) but that's just on your decision since that's coined by Adrienne Rich. Within in essay that was used for radical feminism. Which funny enough, I'm pretty sure why it got dropped out of fashion within queer theory since it's always heteronormativity now.

If you wanna use heteronormativity, you can! Didn't want make you feel like you needed to drop it, I just don't wanna use it myself. Especially since, for me, it makes it like I'm buying into the "queer theory" stuff.

[–]Gearbeta 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Yeah I wouldn't use compulsory heterosexuality either, most of the concepts it talks about are mental gymnastics so straight or bisexual women can dismiss legitimate attraction to men so they can pretend to be lesbians. There's a comp het master doc that says things like "do you have crushes on fictional male characters or male celebrities or otherwise unattainable men?" As one of the things that suggests you're a lesbian. Or having a previous male partner come out as a transwoman as a sign you're a lesbian.

[–]BiHorror 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Shit, I forgot about that... Did that doc happen to be "Am I a lesbian?"

[–]Gearbeta 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The one I saw was from r/latebloomerlesbians's side bar. It's just called Comp Het but it looks like that document has been updated recently, don't worry though it's still garbage.

[–]haveanicedaytoo💗💜💙 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Oh no, I feel the same as you. I really don't want to use any "queer theory" words. Like I used to call myself "gender non-conforming" and people on the internet are confusing the fuck out of me, some say it's a "queer theory" word, some say it's a "rad-fem" word, and I'm just like... "I just want a short and simple way to get across what lens my life experience comes from when I'm explaining something, but without accidentally dogwhistling that I belong to a specific faction that I don't actually belong to!"

These people really are just ruining all the words.................

[–]BiHorror 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah, people do ruin words. As for "GNC" it's often associated with Riki Anne Wilchins. Who just so happened to he the founder of the 1st national transgender advocacy group... Who also coined genderqueer. So, I wouldn't be surprised if it's queer theory. But, I do know RadFem got the sex and gender distinction from John Money, and they were the 1st the adopt the concept.

I'm considered "GNC" as well, but didn't use it when I found out who made the terminological disctinction. So, I just went back to being called tomboy.