I went on a date with the Latina. We ate wings and chicken wraps. We laughed, we talked, we had a good time. When we left, she agreed to go on a second date next week depending on what day she has off.

I am now in existential crisis mode. When I was 9 years old, seeing how the world was quickly spiraling towards darkness, I made a suicide list. I had 6 goals:

1. Become a mentor to someone
   
2. Know what it's like to have real friends
   
3. Become a poet
   
4. Experience the freedom of owning a car
   
5. Date a woman
   

In the last two years, I've experienced everything on this list. This was everything I wanted to achieve before dying. But, now I'm still here. I still have college, I still have a career, I now have a second date with a woman, and I'm getting published as a poet and short-story writer. I don't know what to do anymore. I just feel void. Like, I'm going through motions. I cried three times after that date.

Guys, a date is literally just talking to a woman 1on1 for 40minutes. There's nothing else to it. It's just a conversation. I don't know what I feel anymore. I'm not sitting here trying to figure out how to smooth-talk her into fucking. I'm not sitting here worrying about a second date. All I ever wanted was the date experience. That was it. I'm basically free now. I don't know who I am anymore.