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What's the general consensus on sexuality being a choice?

submitted by SexualityCritical from self.GenderCritical

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[–]SexualityCritical[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I want to clarify, I'm not a woman (as you said, saying I was a 'radical lesbian'). I'm a man. Sorry if that made things weird. Clearly, I am opposed to the fetishisation of lesbianism, or any objectification of women. I am a man with only androphilic fantasies. Elsewhere in this thread, I've stated I'm a man, so I never lied.

To address your claim, you are saying that there are two types of women who go by the lesbian label: 'real lesbians,' who are lesbians because they feel sexual attraction exclusively to women, and fake lesbians ('political lesbians'), who are not lesbians because they're either bisexual or heterosexual, not exclusively sexually attracted to women.

So, the problem here is that sexual attraction needs to be defined. Do you think any woman who wants to be a lesbian is not a lesbian? We're not talking about, for instance, sex or race here. Someone cannot become a woman simply because they say they are. Being a woman is not an identity. Someone cannot become native American simply because they claim they are. Obviously, these things are not choices. But sexuality isn't something you can touch, something material. Sexuality is abstract, invisible, and not someone that can be detected within a person. If someone doesn't tell you they're gay, how do you know? Well, you simply don't, since all sexuality has arrived to mean is self-identification.

A political lesbian is no different from a supposedly real lesbian.

[–]yousaythosethings 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

To address your claim, you are saying that there are two types of women who go by the lesbian label: 'real lesbians,' who are lesbians because they feel sexual attraction exclusively to women, and fake lesbians ('political lesbians'), who are not lesbians because they're either bisexual or heterosexual, not exclusively sexually attracted to women.

No, there are a lot of different reasons some females who do not experience exclusive female-attraction adopt or claim to be lesbians. The other categories were just not relevant.

A political lesbian is no different from a supposedly real lesbian.

You keep saying that as if we homosexual females out here in the field who are in the business of fucking women can't tell the measurable difference between women who are exclusively attracted to women vs. women who are not attracted to women or are attracted to both men and women but pursue women out of misandry. The latter think and talk about men way more than the rest of us.

I'm sorry I mis-identified you as a woman. I did see that later. Unfortunately though, almost nothing you say resonates with my sexuality or my sexual orientation. "Lesbian" is not my identity. In fact, IRL I use this word to describe myself almost never. But it is the word that describes the reality of my sexual orientation. As I said, almost nothing you said resonates with me. I'm a lawyer and constructing, analyzing, deconstructing, and evaluating arguments is what I do for a living. As for yours, you start with boldly stated premises that I don't agree with to begin with because they are so far removed and in conflict with my own experiences and observations. And then from there you jump to an equally preposterous conclusion. That's not worth my time to break down because it would be like arguing with a flat-earther. That you are a man makes a little more sense because you seem to have little understanding of female sexuality and homosexual relationships between two women.

But you know, the easiest relationship I've ever been in is the only relationship I've ever been in with with a man. He was an excellent partner and remains one of my very best friends and close confidantes. So maybe you're onto something. Maybe we should all force ourselves to be in relationships with people we are not attracted to.

Godspeed dude.