Protecting a child from gender nonsense

submitted by Matroskin from self.GenderCritical

Having a small child, I have been thinking about how to protect him from the gender nonsense when he's growing up. I'm obviously going to tell him about women and men factually, with none of the identification nonsense. Nevertheless, he will be exposed to the nonsense.

Best protection from him being sucked to the trans cult, I think, is to raise him in a secure and supportive way to be a well adjusted person. I believe I can do that, as much as a parent can have an influence. Are there some specific points I should be considerate of? Some specific ways of raising a child or specific experiences that tend to be common among those becoming trans later?

Trans ideology will be pushed to him in school and elsewhere. Any thoughts on how to best navigate that?

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[–]jet199 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The main place boys get groomed is online so you need to control that.

Kids are naturally dumb so just raising your kids to be well adjusted isn't going to be enough. You need to clearly spell it to them that they can have any absolutely personality or tastes and still be a full man/woman/boy/girl. This includes not freaking out of they do dress in clothes or play with toys you associated with the opposite sex. It seems counterintuitive but so many detrans people speak of thinking they must be the wrong sex because their parents enforced ridged gender roles they couldn't fit.

You also need to try to teach them to have an internal locus of control so that they concentrate on working through the problems they can change rather than trying to force the world to change just to make themselves feel better.

[–]our_team_is_winning 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I advise regular readings of "The Emperor's New Clothes" followed by a discussion. Why would people go along with a big lie like that? What would you do if everyone was agreeing with something that you knew was false? Why is the small child at the end a hero?

We need to get back to individual thought, even when going against the grain has social repercussions. It sounds trite, but "if all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump too?" actually contains a lot of wisdom!

And steer him toward the hard sciences. Do they still have science magnet schools?

From what I'm reading, autistic and gay children are preyed upon most.

[–]BEB 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Keep him away from TV, computers and phones, unless you can regulate what he sees.

Be aware of what he's being taught in school, and join with other parents in protest if the school tries to push gender ideology.

Be aware of his friend group and their parents.

There's a book by UK author Rachel Rooney (sp?) about accepting yourself. Geared to young children to innoculate them against gender ideology.

Constantly send the message that he is who he is and he's wonderful. Let him chose his clothes; if he chooses girl clothes be fine with it but remind him that he's a biological boy who can like what he likes without shame.

When I was at university, decades ago, I worked in a pre-school which was kind of a lab as well in that experts were observing the kids. We let the kids chose whatever they wanted out of the dress up box. We had one kid, around 4, who was convinced he was a girl for a whole year, and dressed like one, then went back to dressing like a boy. No one batted an eye at his choices either way, and that helped him find himself.

[–]Baileyscheesecakes 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Perhaps the best defense is a good offense. Let the first time your child hears of trans/binary/gender ideology be from you, so that you can control the narrative and your child’s first impressions. Let him know that these people not only think differently, but will try very hard to make him change his mind. How does he feel about that? Is that a nice thing to do? From there, you can offer suggestions for how to cope with situations he may encounter. In a sense, you are preparing him for going into battle. Give him what he needs to survive.

[–]censorshipment 5 insightful - 7 fun5 insightful - 6 fun6 insightful - 7 fun -  (0 children)

I grew up in a very secular/progressive environment during the 80s and 90s. I saw gnc gay men parading around like clowns, but they weren't calling themselves women. I was confused. Then I saw a movie called "To Wong Foo" about three men pretending to be women when they obviously weren't women (looked like female impersonators). I become more confused. My mom told me men can't be women, but I heard her talking to her gnc gay friends differently than she talked to gender conforming men. She called her gnc gay friends "girls" (as in girl friends) even though they weren't women.

What I'm saying is language is important from the perspective of a child. Use it wisely.

Btw, I'm a gnc/butch lesbian. My mom recently called me a "he" and her son as a joke in front of 4 children. Yet she doesn't believe a woman can be a man. The confusion. My mom is not a "woke" libfem by any means... she's just very obnoxious (which is why I'm so obnoxious too).

[–]grixit 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I recommend the book "Memoirs of Extraordinary Popular Delusions and the Madness of Crowds". It was published in 1852, so there's no chance of advocates of the psychological cases discussed showing up to argue. You can get it for free from the Gutenberg Project here: http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/24518.

[–]BEB 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

But is there an audiobook? /s

Thanks for this link. I'd heard of this book but never read it.

[–]purrvana 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Keep them busy with sports and hobbies. The more they fill their life with skills and hobbies, the less they'll feel like they have to create their identity with what they "feel". If your kid is too busy practicing their soccer skills in the backyard, they're less likely to be inside on the internet being indoctrinated.

And I agree with what the others here say - less internet (or more restrictions), and pay attention to what's being taugh to them in school.

[–]absoluteblasphemy 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

As other commenters have mentioned this is a very online thing, but it’s offline too. In general be wary of any “trans” friends your child makes. We have evidence that it’s a social contaminant, especially amongst kids and teens, so it’s difficult to confront that.

When it comes to kids I don’t personally have any but I would always like to impart to younger people that our bodies are very precious and important and that we shouldn’t cut or hurt bodies. That’s the kind of intuitive thing kids get rather than the complex conversations we have here. Having this boundary and sense of my body stopped me from transitioning even I was in deep with the trans mob. I think a lot of people that opt for trans surgeries or get sucked into sex-isn’t-real land they have no sense of their bodies, or other people’s.

Ha, the best antidote to the trans ideology I’ve got; self love and good personal boundaries. What a miserly, hateful TERF I must be!