I'm a guy and only began learning what feminism actual was about from I guess a rather fringe group who were somewhere along the line between "rad" fem and eco-feminism via the Green Party, long ago. The biggest thing that grabbed my attention then was the idea that women, when organized or self-organized, operate organizationally very differently than men. They felt that for women to be equals in society, the top-down corporate or military ways of leadership and advancement must be seen as part of the problem, and these other ways must been understood as viable organizational approaches and men should learn to see these alternatives as viable because they are and they are often better suited to many tasks people organize around. They also noted, citing anthropologists and specifically urban anthropologists, how in activist movements the women organized things and ran things regardless of who was out front or appearing to run things. They felt there were no social movements without women really running and sustaining them. I do not have any sources for these ideas now as it was long ago, but your comment reminded me of that. It also reminded me of the idea that women who climb up to the top of these oppressive systems do so not in serving any real feminist cause but in emulating the worst traits of men who climb to the top, so that the idea of just getting more women in positions of power was short-sighted and ignored how getting that power actually happened or how that power actually operates.