I briefed SO on what his mother said to me, specifically that she believes she will be released as early as tomorrow, that said doctors themselves have opined she will probably be back in the hospital quite a few times. That she believes that he and DIL will collectively care for her needs, that while I appreciate I'm welcome, I don't really have a role so I expect my presence to be minimal.

He's like, we have to take it one step at a time. I'm like, you mean like Covid in February. He could blow up that plan of hers right now by calling her and saying he's out, but he's not going to have an excuse unless it's full time employment, which he is not making a priority. And he doesn't want to make her cry.

This woman grew up totally white privilege, was conventionally attractive in her younger days, and that's what she does, and that's what she expects. No one can say anything against her "emergencies" whether they genuinely are, or whether they are about the cat box having turds out of it that she needs so to clean up so she can resume "wanting to live." She'll just start bawling or screaming and they'll give her what she wants. The DIL is the same way.

SO is pissed, he thinks she is selfish, but how selfish she is is going to be something that he's going to have to figure out by himself. With him over there working for the equivalent of $16.50 per hour (assuming the 8 hour volunteering on top of the paid 12), I'd assume he wants to be better than that for our relationship. She is not going to be better fast for sure and i'm not going to opine that I want her to decline rapidly (although that is surely coming). She might "give" him money for a nice Valentine's Day dinner and if all this malarkey is still going on then, I'll give his ring back. Then or before then.