Everyone, I really need your advice. It seems like I'm going to have to give my little sister some kind of sex/sexuality/gender identity all-in-one talk and I'm dreading it. She's almost 12 and already sucked into internet bs (and I suppose this is the age for that conversation regardless)

submitted by fuckupaddams from self.GenderCritical

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[–]zephyranthes 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

But to me this sounds like you are telling the older sibling, addams - who from her post is a mere 21/22 herself - to be the boss of her parents, no? Sounds like you are saying it's her job to educate her own parents and somehow "get them to get (little sister) off the internet."

Not be the boss of her parents, educate them. Presidents have advisors, you know. Her parents are uninformed that people on the internet are grooming their child.

The child cannot consent to grooming. Trying to negotiate with the child to make her change her mind is nonsensical, because the child could not have consented. In some places, it's even illegal to provide her with the information for her to make an, uh, informed choice. The older sister should not be telling an 11-year-old about Yaniv trying to insert tampons into teen girls or Phil "Ana Valens" Wythe's rape camps. The people who are responsible for access to the child are the parents. They, with their parental authority, should decisively shut down grooming attempts and continue to safeguard the child.

The older sister should not be the one talking to the girl. She does not have parental authority, she can only "persuade", and we've already established the girl cannot be meaningfully "persuaded" because she can't give consent. Furthermore, I think it's bad parenting to argue with the child if you're going to put your foot down anyway, by proxy or otherwise. It robs the child of of autonomy in those aspects of her life she can be trusted with, like clothes, or food, or scheduling, or choice of advanced courses for college.

[–]MarkTwainiac 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Presidents have advisors, you know. Her parents are uninformed that people on the internet are grooming their child.

Presidents have other adults as advisors. Even presidents who've had family members and in-laws as advisors have not customarily asked such young persons to take up this role. From Chester Arthur to Bobby Kennedy to Dick Cheney to Jared Kushner, there's not a tradition of Presidents relying on 21/22 year-old family members or friends as advisors. Or are you suggesting that Richard Nixon considered his SIL David Eisenhower to be one of his advisors?

Her parents are uninformed that people on the internet are grooming their child.

But the cluelessness of the parents is their fault; it's not the responsibility of the older sibling to correct it.

The older sister should not be the one talking to the girl. She does not have parental authority, she can only "persuade", and we've already established the girl cannot be meaningfully "persuaded" because she can't give consent. Furthermore, I think it's bad parenting to argue with the child if you're going to put your foot down anyway, by proxy or otherwise. It robs the child of of autonomy in those aspects of her life she can be trusted with, like clothes, or food, or scheduling, or choice of advanced courses for college.

I didn't say the older sister should try to "persuade" the younger one. I said the older sister should befriend the younger sister, get her out of the house, show her a different way...

I don't understand the rest of your post.