unisex toilets and my sister’s secondary school.

submitted by psychelune from self.GenderCritical

hi, i’m new to this “sub”. maybe this is a good place to share my concerns with the new toilets at my sister’s secondary school (11-18 year olds). in order to “keep up with the times” her school (and my old school) knocked down the toilets and replaced them with one big unisex toilet block. there’s so many problems with this. the female toilets no longer exist. and this is in a school where girls are starting their first periods and want a space to be able to talk about it with other girls and share tampons and stuff. and teenage boys can be real shitheads too, teasing and sexism is still the norm unfortunately. i’m beyond furious about this. i actually started my period at school myself, and my friends were kind enough to help me out with fresh clothes and pads in the safety of our female toilets. i cannot imagine having to go through that in a space shared with teenage boys, but this is the reality now.

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[–]our_team_is_winning 28 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 0 fun29 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I had my period at 11, and it was often heavy. Just trying to deal with pads and changing my underwear in the girls bathroom was stressful enough. This is an injustice toward all females and we need a Mother of All Lawsuits here. This is cruelty to females. Stripping females (and males) of sex-segregated spaces on behalf of a tiny minority of mentally ill people is wrong. Do they understand why we had sex-segregated toilets in the first place? And this isn't even letting the TiM use the female toilet, but forcing everyone together. Boys who want to stink up the toilet or jerk off or whatever they do -- I doubt they want to do that around the girls either. Unless parents protest en masse and file a big lawsuit, nothing is going to change. My heart aches for girls in this situation.

[–]MarkTwainiac 24 insightful - 1 fun24 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Depending on where you live, this might be illegal. In the UK, school regulations stipulate that from age 8 boys and girls must have separate toilets. In the US, the laws vary from state to state.

Also, in many jurisdictions, there'd be no way that students age 11-18 would all be lumped together coz - apart from sex - the size and developmental differences between 11 year-olds and people 6-7 years older are so vast. It's a matter of big people against smaller people.

[–]itsnotaboutewe 21 insightful - 1 fun21 insightful - 0 fun22 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Now that you are no longer a student there you can lose your fear of the authority figures at the school and become pro-active on your sister's behalf. She may not feel confident enough to question things or cause trouble but you are in a perfect position to advocate for her.

Find out whether males and females sharing toilets is legal where you are or if there are legal protections in place that state toilets must be separate. You could ask the school head if an 11 yo girl should be forced to learn how to use a tampon in the stall next to an 18yo adult male student taking a shit. Because you are a former student you can recount the times that girls have escaped to the female-only toilets in order to get away from boys. Tell them about your own experiences and how you would have felt if there were no female toilets in that situation. Tell them this is not ok and that you will be speaking to the press about how the lack of privacy will impact the whole school population. Find other students who are unhappy with this new toilet block and, if you feel brave enough, let them know you will help them fight for their right to privacy, safety, and dignity at school.

Most importantly, find your local MP, Senator, etc, who represents your district and speak to them about the problem and ask for their help in restoring the toilets to separate male and female facilities. They are there to serve you so take full advantage of this.

[–]BEB 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Exactly - SPEAK OUT. Talk to other parents/ relatives. Organize. Attend school board meetings and raise hell.

A UK study found that 90% of sexual assaults happened in mixed-sex changing rooms (locker rooms) - if you care about your girls, SPEAK OUT NOW.

[–]Eurowoman24 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

this is so fucked up.

[–]yousaythosethings 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I say without exaggeration that middle and high school were the worst times of my life and I’m in my 30s now. I came from an abusive household and just had no peace anywhere. How many times did I escape to the bathroom so I could have privacy while letting my emotions out? Or to escape a really uncomfortable social moment? Or even to put on makeup while catching up with friends who weren’t in my classes.

That’s all gone. They think they’re being progressive and freeing people but they are eliminating the natural social spaces. You can’t speak up and merely ask questions in class now and now you also can’t talk freely with your friends in the bathroom. What do they think they’re doing.

[–]BEB 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

In the US, the Gavin Grimms case that was ruled on in August will allow transgender students to use the bathroom of their choice. Note how opposition is framed as "anti-transgender":

https://www.politico.com/news/2020/08/26/court-yes-transgender-rights-gavin-grimm-bathroom-402532

[–]MarkTwainiac 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Also take note of the fact that in many/most of the legal cases challenging sex-specific toilets, locker rooms and sleeping accommodations in schools, TIFs are being used as the advance guard shock troops. The TIM-led trans lobby is using TIFs to remove protections and provisions based on sex so that all previously sex-segregated spaces, services and sports will now be open to anyone based solely on their "gender identity" claims.

This reminds me very much of how Ayatollah Khomeini in Iran conscripted poor, orphaned children and impoverished, abandoned women to serve on the front lines in the disastrous war he started with Iraq. Those kids and women were sent out to "take down" border-territory land mines by setting them off with their bodies, often/usually at the expense of their lives, in order to clear the way for the invading troops and tanks behind them who were lying in wait.

[–]yishengqingwa666 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yes, this is the reality that MEN have decided.

Time to get a lawyer. It is lawsuit time.