Something I don’t understand and this could be due to my age, mid 30s....... okay, late 30s, is how friends “break up” due to a single difference of opinion as benign as trans ideology? I can’t imagine completely abandoning a friend because she holds opposing views, or vice versa, it’s unfathomable to me and this issue crops up in these forums regularly.

Out of interest, when people are referring to losing a friend, do they mean an Instagram/Facebook/Twitter virtual acquaintance, or an actual, “we’ll meet for drinks after work” friend. I don’t consider anyone online a friend, I’m friendly but, there’s no emotional investment to constitute a true friendship - I need real life human interaction.

I drifted away from a very, very close friend because she became “born again“. I humoured her and attended her church a few times but once she started talking in tongues, I knew it was the beginning of something grim, when she refused to attend Yoga because she felt the devils presence - the end was imminent. There were some raised voices and pettiness but the friendship naturally dissolved.

I coped because I didn’t feel guilt or shame or abandonment since there were no manipulating factors at play and importantly, I had other friends. We simply grew and parted ways, this is as natural a part of adulthood as it is childhood.

I would reconsider who you call a friend if you suspect their reaction to your personal views could be met with abject hostility instead of inquisitiveness over a coffee? Maybe they’re just acquaintances who don’t need to know your every thought and opinion. As a rule, I don’t advertise potentially controversial views until I’ve shared a few meals with someone and sussed them out a bit, not everyone you exchange niceties with is friend material.