I am so sick of having to f-king explain everything I do to people!

submitted by midgetmetalhead19 from self.GenderCritical

Don’t shave when you’re not going out- lazy. Don’t wear makeup because you have sensitive skin (hypoallergenic doesn’t work, even a face mask makes me itch)- have I tried everything on the market? No- I’m tired of feeling borderline ill just to please you! Nothing has worked so far, so excuse me for giving up on this! I’m just tired of being bullied by my own fucking family because I’m not overly feminine in my ways- by that I mean obsessed with my appearance. I’m short and slender with long hair, so I’m reasonably feminine looking naturally, even with the muscle. I just don’t perform femininity. Why can’t I just be myself! I’m ‘presentable’ when I go out ( I shave when my legs are visible), but this isn’t enough. Why can’t I just be myself? Why do I have to explain everything to people and then more still.

PS- I just really needed this rant, so it’ll read awfully. So thanks for letting me vent.

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[–]NDG 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

You don’t have to explain everything to them. Tell them the topic is closed, and then if they bring it up again, don’t respond at all.

[–]Jalaces 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Where you live women always shave their legs? Wow that sounds like such a pain.

[–]midgetmetalhead19[S] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think my Mum thinks they do but probably hasn’t discussed it. The few I’ve spoken with do what I do. Leave it until you’re out in shorts/sleeveless.

[–]EnnuiOz 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Shaving your legs as a woman is still pretty much 99% of the female population over here (Aus) but, as I am closing in on my 50's I just have no more shits to give. I don't even think about my hairy extremities and go about my business in shorts during the summer with no thought to it. If people stare, I certainly don't notice it and, I have never had an audible comment directed to me about it.

Honestly, it has been quite liberating and I am very hairy. I just really don't care.

[–]itsnotaboutewe 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I would like the world to consider natural women (no makeup, not shaved, comfortable clothes, etc,) to actually be wearing the latest fashion inspired by lockdowns. The world is accepting of new fashions so we could have this 'new' look become fashionable so more women adopt it and we wouldn't get harassed for not doing femininity. We could reclaim our natural bodies by never discarding this fashion.

[–]midgetmetalhead19[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I’m absolutely for this.

[–]FuriousPenguin 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I don't even bother shaving unless I'm outside the house. Even then if I'm just taking out the garbage or bringing in the mail I don't bother. Where do these shaving-all-the-time women even live!! Don't bother about them.

[–]YoutiaoLover 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I can relate to you. My mom always upset when I cut my hair short, comment on how "big" my "ass" is even though it's because I have wide hip bones, pestering me to wear make up and try to make me wear dresses. I still cut my hair short, don't give a damn about my ass (I maintain healthy weight though), go out barefaced and wear trousers. Do whatever you want. As long as you don't go out looking like Cookie Monster, you don't owe anybody explanation.

[–]courage2courage 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Why can’t I just be myself? Why do I have to explain everything to people and then more still.

You can.

Don't explain.

[–][deleted] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Some families are simply toxic. Try to remove yourself from their presence as soon as humanly possible.

[–]TeaAndCigarettes 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I probably only shave my legs a couple times a year. The occasions are usually sex or swimsuit. I don't bother continuing relationships with men who are brainless, shallow pieces of shit so I'm pretty upfront about the rarity with which I shave my legs and if they don't like it we find a compromise, they learn to deal or they can go pound sand. I DO shave my armpits because having too much hair there just honestly irritates the hell out of me but it gets fairly long before it bothers me. Come to think of it, I work out at the gym and lift weights with spiky pits lol. No one has said shit but my gym is 95% female.

My point is I don't think its super rare and every women I have ever spoken to ever says she wishes she could go without the incessant shaving. Women aren't going to look at you with anything but a little shock and envy (perhaps disgust if the internalized misogyny is high) and if men pitch a fit then cut them out of your life.

Man, I had an ex who gave me so much hell about not shaving my vagina and I told him it itched and i hated it and he could deal. He wanted it smooth and hairless 27/4. Turned out to be into the kiddo stuff if you know what I mean.

TL;DR if a guy gives you hell about the hair then tell him to fuck off and take a flying leap he's not there for who you are.

[–]mangosplums 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

People treat me the same way. It’s actually really hurtful. It’s like they make all these assumptions about you just because you don’t wear make up and dress casually. Personally, I just don’t like being wasteful. I’m not materialistic or consumerist.