What I mean when I distinguish between trans activism and the majority of trans people I know in real life is a simple, but important, thing. The majority of trans people I know in real life freely admit their biological sex, freely distinguish between themselves and natal males/females, and don't feel harmed by discussion of biology or sexed bodies. They generally also acknowledge there are non-transphobic reasons to be concerned about trans women competing in women's sports or being in women's prisons. They support gender neutral bathrooms, but aren't offended by talking about how current bathrooms need to be altered to make gender neutral bathrooms safe.

I have seen some drifting towards biological denialism over the past two years, so I don't know how much the above will change. But unfortunately, I've also seen that drifting in many of my non-trans friends because I've been in super woke circles. With a few exceptions, people are following the trend rather than leading it.

I do wonder about the percentage of autogynephilia. Now that I know more about it, I wouldn't be surprised to learn that something like 3/4 of the trans people I know have some degree of autogynephilia. But if so, it isn't influencing creepy or predatory behavior in any perceptible way.

For me, it's important to acknowledge this because at heart, I'm simply not anti-trans. I believe transition helps a lot of people. I don't think our rights have to be in conflict. I can acknowledge gender identity if trans people will acknowledge biological sex, and we can work through when the one matters more than the other (for example, gender identity mattering for dress codes in the workspace but sex mattering for sports and vulnerable spaces like changing rooms or prisons.) But the fetish-driven trans activism is forcing our rights in conflict, and women need to be able to call it out.