Dementia care advice for trans patients

submitted by AraucariaAraucana from self.GenderCritical

I thought this was interesting:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-43365446

"As dementia progresses a person may not recall their current gender and they may see themselves being pre-transition and be surprised at the physical changes to their bodies.

"This can result in them becoming very disorientated and anxious. They may not understand why they are being referred to as being a certain gender as they cannot recall publicly voicing this preference."

If gender identity is some fixed, unchangeable thing then why would patients be distressed at being referred to as their 'correct' gender?

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[–]venecia 31 insightful - 1 fun31 insightful - 0 fun32 insightful - 1 fun -  (11 children)

I mean, I don't think that's exactly fair. Many patients with advanced dementia can't recall lots of other facets of their core identity. You're just as likely to have to talk them down from panicking about being referred to as the wrong gender as you are to remind them of the current year and that you're not their mother. Some multi-lingual people don't even speak their mother tongue!

That said, I'm interested to know exactly how carers are being told to deal with this. Are they even allowed to fib to patients and ''misgender'' them, even if not doing so would bring them more distress?

Oh wait it's here. Jesus..

They also include advice on how to help a transgender person with dementia to maintain their preferred appearance when they can no longer do it themselves.

So we're to force a dress on a man even if he no longer identifies as a woman? What the what now?

[–]DifferentAirGC 40 insightful - 1 fun40 insightful - 0 fun41 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Has a non-trans person ever fogotten their "gender"?

[–]tuesday 22 insightful - 2 fun22 insightful - 1 fun23 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Yes, i think i'd rather hear about all the thousands of non-trans with dementia who spontaneously switch genders. When it's only the transpeople, and they are reverting back to their bio sex then something's quite off about the whole thing.

And i wonder what percentage of transpeople with dementia that this happens to. Half of them? Ninety percent? i'm guessing it's high.

[–]peregrine_throw 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Long term cross-sex hormone therapy causes brain shrinkage in males. Definitely increases memory problems, mood disorders and dementia risks.

[–]Realwoman 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

Don't dementia patients forget languages they learned later in life? I'm curious.

But if a man has always been a woman, then obviously he must have known he's one since always.

[–]DifferentAirGC 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

then obviously he must have known he's one since always.

Yeah. The way trans people talk about their innate gender and brain "map", I'd think forgetting it would be like forgetting you have a leg/arm. Which I don't think it's something that happens.

[–]venecia 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Don't dementia patients forget languages they learned later in life? I'm curious.

It can go any way really. I've met some that forget foreign languages, and some that understand their own language but speak back in a foreign one!

[–]Realwoman 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Interesting. My grandma gradually started losing her most recent memories until she was left with the childhood memories only. I assumed that was standard.

[–]WrongToy 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I heard people end up with the memories they had when they're 18.

[–]AraucariaAraucana[S] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I didn't know that about forgetting your mother tongue. I can understand forgetting foreign languages you've learned but that's just weird.

[–]tuesday 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

i would guess it's because they immigrated to a different country at a very young age and then immersed themselves in that culture, for decades.

[–]Lucretia 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That is awful - non-consensual to the person with dementia and cruel

[–]meranii 27 insightful - 2 fun27 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

There's so much abuse in elder care, sexual abuse, physical abuse and neglect, people are lying in their beds and their full diapers go unchanged for hours and hours, their muscles atrophy and they develop bedsores because a lot of those places are understaffed and there's barely any time for individual care... but sure, let's please focus our efforts on their gender identity, the performance of which they might remember to keep up that day (or not). Put a wig and some makeup on the angry old guy while poor old Barbara's bedpan hasn't been emptied in a day. Then some other day he might try to attack the nurse for putting the wig on him because treating him like a woman is obviously insulting.

[–]tarun 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They also include advice on how to help a transgender person with dementia to maintain their preferred appearance when they can no longer do it themselves.

This is normal for dementia care. You should strive to maintain their appearance they had when they were healthy. As far as is possible, of course. Like how jeans aren't a comfortable option anymore when you need diapers and you have limited mobility, so they might have to switch to sweatpants.

BUT, carers should also be observant to the patient's current needs. Dementia patients are still adults, and they should get to choose what they want to wear right then and there, if possible. If someone is showing obvious distress from wearing a dress, then that should obviously be avoided.

Just like if someone has been vegan for 50 years, but suddenly wants to eat steak and is refusing the broccoli. Then guess what? They get steak, even if the family gets angry about it. It's the person's choice, not the family's.

[–]slushpilot 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

This is incredibly sad.

I never really thought about this before but wouldn't this show evidence of one's true "identity" once the will to maintain it is no longer there?

Research in this area could potentially find a way to diagnose whether there is actually such a thing as a "true transexual" in clinical terms. I assume there are drugs (psychedelics/disassociative) that can induce a similar state, and could also help a "dysphoric" patient see if this identity is something they can still hold onto below a purely conscious level.

[–]crodish 10 insightful - 6 fun10 insightful - 5 fun11 insightful - 6 fun -  (0 children)

"Excuse me, Mr. Johnson? It's time for your - "

"How DARE you misgender me?!"

"Er - sorry, I meant... Ms. Jamie...?"

"Why do you keep misgendering me?!"

[–]Realwoman 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I remember someone talking about this on a Peak Trans thread. Definitely made an impression on me.

[–]Anna_Nym 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

This is interesting, but I think the significance of it is unclear from the article. I can't tell if carers have experienced trans patient's being distressed by the gender identity assigned to them or if it is more about trans patient's not remembering the specific changes and disclosures. A trans patient may be confused about no longer having his penis, but also delighted by it. Or alternatively, a trans patient may be confused and agitated by having a body that no longer fits what he remembers.

But if there are patients who are actually reverting back to identifying with their biological sex, to me, that would be be significant.

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

This shitshow is their future.

When they get dementia, they won’t even remember the trans version creation of language.

WTF is cis? What is trans? What’s a girldick?

[–]Realwoman 8 insightful - 10 fun8 insightful - 9 fun9 insightful - 10 fun -  (0 children)

If you're 70, is your dick still a girldick? When does it turn into grandma dick?

[–]LoganBlade 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Rapid onset fetishistic gender dysphoria

ROFGD

can we make this a thing

[–]materialrealityplz 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

That would be weird, to wake up one day forgetting you transitioned to a woman and wondering why you have boobs and where your dick went.

[–]yousaythosethings 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I was literally googling this topic just the other day because it came into my mind and I was wondering what would happen if a person suffering from dementia could only remember aspects of their lives before the gender seed was planted.

[–]Delia 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I worked for a number of years with dementia people, none were confused about their sex. I am not saying that cannot happen,I have never seen it.