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[–]MarkTwainiac 5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 3 fun -  (5 children)

I would like to be a mother and bring life into the world, and if or when it were safe for me to do so, I would seriously consider it.

But yesterday you said that the very idea of having children made you want to vomit.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

Oh sorry I should have clarified. I meant like, with my "natural" biology. I don't want to be a...f*ther, the idea grosses me out so much.

[–]MarkTwainiac 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

But being a parent is at its core most fundamentally about raising a child. It's not about being a father or a mother. Weighed against the long span of time it takes for human offspring to grow to full maturity and be able to function on their own and support themselves, the 40 weeks it takes women to gestate a human child is small potatoes - and the teeny-tiny amount of time it takes to conceive a child is nothing. The human male biological role in bringing "life into the world" in particular usually takes just few minutes to accomplish from start to finish.

the idea grosses me out so much.

In my opinion, anyone grossed out by any aspect of human biology is not fit to be a parent.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

The human male biological role in bringing "life into the world" in particular usually takes just few minutes to accomplish from start to finish.

That's a role I'm not at all willing to play.

In my opinion, anyone grossed out by any aspect of human biology is not fit to be a parent.

I'm only grossed out by my own, not others'

[–]MarkTwainiac 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I'm only grossed out by my own, not others'

Sorry, it doesn't work that way. People who are grossed out by their own biology, body parts and bodily functions end up communicating their disgust to their children in myriad ways - many of them unconscious and unintentional. Having and raising children involves intimate contact with their bodies, and all their body parts - and there's a lot of gross stuff involved such as blood, vomit, meconium, and tons of foul-smelling, weird-colored and strange-textured shit. Not to mention the occasional bout of head lice when little kids are in school - and the crusty spots on sheets, undershorts and tissues left around when male children reach a certain age.

I fear your negative feelings about your own body would inevitably get transferred to your kids, and would very much mess us any male child you have. I suspect your views on sex and female human beings would screw up any daughters you have too. I don't mean you would make this happen on purpose, but it would happen all the same. Look what happened to Howard Hughes.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

How is this not just the same tired rhetoric that was brought up against gay parents though? Trans people are perfectly capable of being around and not disgusted by children just like anyone else.

I'm an adult, I'm capable of compartmentalizing my body dysmorphia and not applying it to everyone else. Me being dysphoric would not make me a bad parent.

I've mostly had men as partners and I was never disgusted with their bodies. Obvi I don't expect raising a kid to be a cakewalk and I expect to have to deal with more mess than I've ever had before. That isn't different from other new parents though..