QT: Why TM don't mind using women's spaces when it suits them? And why TW don't follow their example?

submitted by BiologyIsReal from self.GCdebatesQT

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[–]loveSloaneDebate King 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I actually don’t disagree with you, at this point, I’m just wondering why that was your response if you know it’s not really something that would work irl?

I do disagree that trans people are the best at judging passing, I don’t know that they realize that there are tells that the rest of us notice. A lot of them (incorrectly) think they pass, particularly because the rest of us don’t tell them otherwise and they’re being told they pass by each other. I personally think that bathrooms should be sex based, and trans people can take a gamble on their passability if they want (meaning a woman should be able to tell an obvious male to exit a female space if she wants) but even that is flawed because I don’t think most women would say something when we notice a TW in our space.

I do get that in the real world we just have to deal, regardless of how we feel.

[–]beris😎 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

I do get that in the real world we just have to deal, regardless of how we feel.

That's the crux of it, for me I guess. I agree most women wouldn't say anything to a nonpassing TW, so that makes "go where you'd look normal going" harder. But again like, at the end of the day, I'm happier if the absolute minimum to infringe on women's spaces is happening. Sorry if im not explaining myself well it's past my bedtime, I'm getting too sleepy.

[–]loveSloaneDebate King 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I get what you mean now.

And good night!

[–]divingrightintowork 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I'm not sure what your stance is on IDs but on the OG reddit r/GC sub I think I once said something to the extent of "At the end of the day no one really wants to police bathrooms but on the chance that weird things are going on and someone doesn't look like they belong, women would like the ability to have that person removed or otherwise informed that there are more appropriate bathrooms for them," which is to say if an obvs M is in the W bathroom, and probs doing more than just beelining to a toilet and back out with a hand wash - someone may talk with management.
Generally it was heavily upvoted and most GCs inc IIRC u/lovesloane agreed that that was pretty much the realistic GC take.