I'm not interested in defending ideas I don't hold

You're the one who's made claims that trans people aren't persecuted and that everyone is already on the same page with them, which is inconsistent with what trans activism is claiming. If you make claims that are incorrect or damaging, it is up to you to confirm or distance yourself from them when you're called out on them, instead of hiding behind "Well, I didn't mean for it to sound bad or nonsensical". I really really don't care what you wish your claims sounded like, what matters is what they're actually saying and the direct negative effects they have on our society.

defending people I don't know.

It's too bad that reality goes farther than your circle of friends. People you or I "don't know" and don't go out for coffee with are hard at work dismantling women's rights, and I have no interest in sipping coffee with them and getting to know their life story just so I could have the "right" to call them out on their shitty practices. I don't need to get chummy with fascists so I could take a stance against their ideology.

You are in a position where you know you benefit from these "people you don't know" pushing hard against women's rights, and it's even worse if you admit that personally, you recognise their positions are full of shit, but refuse to call them out due to shared benefits and privileges you are reaping from said violations of rights. Claiming that it doesn't concern you because of your privileged status doesn't actually make irrational and damaging statements you and your side is making acceptable. These statements by themselves being misogynistic or illogical is par for the course with QT, and I have no issue with that given that the person making them attempts to rationalise them. I do have issue with lying and squirming out of recognising the reality and the very real effects of their ideology just because you "don't want to think about it". QT that can even attempt to form a coherent argument are pretty rare, but it's worthless if your very next sentence is just going to be "transwomen are women" anyways. That's just the usual brainwashing with a couple of more steps in between trying to make the person feel less bad for knowingly parroting toxic and irrational views and thinking it's mean to expect them to rationalise them.