Bi culture: possible? desirable? what should it look like?

submitted by PenseePansy from self.Bisexuals

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[–]PeakingPeachEater 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Ah, I see, I do see your vision and it is appealing. Yes, that would be nice if we had our own FULL culture instead of sub(?) cultures. It is rather...whacky that we hardly have anything.

The only way I think we can "claim" it(if that is the right word) is to create our content and spread the word!

Maybe...this is just me but I notice some strange commonalities when finding out someone is bisexual. For the bisexual men I meet, they're typically musical/artsy/creative types. Go with the flow, easy going, not scared of femininity. I think this might...be a (good?) stereotype to incorporate into bisexual culture---that bisexual (men) are creative and easy going. Idk. As for bisexual women...They may be more of a "femme tomboy" (once again stereotype,not sure if detrimental or..good?) or gender non-conforming.

Or perhaps bisexuals have a good balance/mix of feminine and masculine energy. We're not afraid of either side and own it. Maybe we have "bi cycles" with how masculine or feminine we decide to appear(I know I have! Decided I like being more on the androgynous side instead of extreme both) and bi cycles with what was mentioned earlier about our attraction. I think that would be good components to bi culture.

I wanted to look into the history of bisexuals to see if maybe we can pull some culture out of that or at least have some cool idols to look after!

Kristen Stewart seems like a cool cat too! She's bisexual and date both men AND women! Some try to claim her as lesbian, but she said so herself she's bi! Maybe we can pull inspiration from people like her?

I also found interesting quote from Ana Paquin

The former True Blood actress appeared on Larry King Now in 2014 where King asked her if she was a “non-practicing bisexual” to which Anna replied she was happily and monogamously married to actor Stephen Moyer, reports E! News.

King pressed her, asking, “But you were bisexual?” Paquin responded, saying: ”Well, I don't think it's a past tense thing. Are you still straight if you are with somebody?... If you were to break up with them or if they were to die, it doesn't prevent your sexuality from existing. It doesn't really work like that.”

Source: 35 Celebrities Who Say They're Attracted To Both Men And Women

[–]PenseePansy[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Ah, I see, I do see your vision and it is appealing. Yes, that would be nice if we had our own FULL culture instead of sub(?) cultures. It is rather...whacky that we hardly have anything.

Glad that it ain't just me! :) Especially when even subcultures for us (let alone the full-fledged, comprehensive bi-culture that we dream of) are so thin on the ground. Yeah, this sad state of affairs does seem pretty strange, doesn't it? Where is our version of what gay/lesbian people have?

My theory is that it has to do (at least in part) with the following: 1.] bisexuality not even being regarded as a sexual orientation at all; and 2.] our fledgling community/movement somehow getting shoved aside by, and then ignored in favor of, the "TQ+".

In brief: the first causes "bi invisibility" so pervasive that it often makes our own bisexuality invisible even to us, and we consequently identify as either straight or gay; such people aren't available to help build a bi culture (though they may be enthusiastic contributors to gay/lesbian culture). It also promotes the misconception that "bi = half-and-half", which suggests that having a culture of our own is unnecessary-- we can just go to either straight or gay culture (as the case may be) for all our needs, right? Why even bother with anything bi-specific?

How the second came about is still something of a mystery to me, but it sure seems suspicious that a bi culture was beginning to emerge in the early 1990s... and the "trans"/"queer" stuff at right around the same time. Then it was like the TQ sucked up all the oxygen. So there was none left for us, and we shrank back to where we'd been before, while they continued to grow... indeed, at an out-of-control, kudzu-esque rate. I can't help but feel as though their success came at our expense somehow. Does it look that way to anyone else?

The only way I think we can "claim" it(if that is the right word) is to create our content and spread the word!

Peach, you're a one-woman content-creating dynamo! :) Hope that my far-more lethargic ass can at least help ya out a little bit! And that we might inspire other people to pitch in, too. Which brings me to...

Maybe...this is just me but I notice some strange commonalities when finding out someone is bisexual. For the bisexual men I meet, they're typically musical/artsy/creative types. Go with the flow, easy going, not scared of femininity. I think this might...be a (good?) stereotype to incorporate into bisexual culture---that bisexual (men) are creative and easy going. Idk. As for bisexual women...They may be more of a "femme tomboy" (once again stereotype,not sure if detrimental or..good?) or gender non-conforming.

Or perhaps bisexuals have a good balance/mix of feminine and masculine energy. We're not afraid of either side and own it. Maybe we have "bi cycles" with how masculine or feminine we decide to appear(I know I have! Decided I like being more on the androgynous side instead of extreme both) and bi cycles with what was mentioned earlier about our attraction. I think that would be good components to bi culture.

I'm sorta of two minds about this, Peach. On the one hand, it really appeals to me personally-- this view of bi men, and bisexuals in general as having transcended gender-role straitjackets. This is what I'd like to think that bisexuality means, yanno? But on the other hand... since most bi people either aren't out, or don't even recognize their own bisexuality, could this be a skewed impression based on the type who's likely to openly self-identify as bi? In the face of messages that it doesn't exist, and means that you're an unstable, unreliable, pretentious, ultra-open-minded, slutty weirdo? I suspect that more conventional-- much less conservative or even reactionary-- bi people don't declare it, or (in many cases) even realize it. Could there be a lot of "invisible bis" like that? Can't say for sure, of course, but it wouldn't surprise me. Typically-masculine guys (macho ones, even!) and girly-girl women! Who knows how many of 'em are covertly-bi? And just unable to relate to bisexuality's artsy, androgynous image?

Which is one of the reasons why I think we need to emphasize that bisexuality is, first and foremost, a sexual orientation. Not a personality; not "open-mindedness"; not a fad, fashion statement, or phase; not being automatically into anyone & everyone. Just the capacity for attraction to both sexes. Nothing more; nothing less. And maybe we can build a culture from there. With that as the foundation. What do you think?

And having blabbed on at such length, I'll spare you my thoughts re: bi history for the time being! :)