Is anyone out there/thoughts on biphobia

submitted by Constantine from self.Bisexuals

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[–]clitoriana 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I think biphobia is more like, people not believing it exists, that it's a phase or a stepping stone to gay, or that "everyone is a little bit bi." (<--that last one is widely perpetuated by bisexuals themselves, but for some reason straight people like to say it too and it's yet another way actual bisexuality is dismissed and erased)

Also, the way it's hard for many to wrap their heads around the concept of bisexuality being a WHOLE sexuality on it's own and not half straight/half gay, or 60/40, etc. Not fluid - though our attractions and preferences and desires and behaviors may be fluid, our sexuality is and always will be BI.

There's also stereotypes about us being sexually deviant, predatory, only into sex and hooking up, incapable of real love, unfaithful cheaters, can't make up our minds, down to fuck anything that moves, STD-riddled, into threesomes and group sex and polyamory... I could go on. I know there are some bisexuals that fit those descriptions but we are an incredibly diverse group.

Some of this stuff can overlap with homophobia or misogyny, but these things are aimed toward bi people so I'd consider it biphobia.

I wish I knew how to address it. I think it would require a level of energy and willingness to put myself out there that I don't have. I don't engage with "the community" at large and my few close friends are lesbians. I just don't want to deal with everyone's preconceived notions about us, especially as a bi woman.

Not dating for a lot of reasons lol, especially during this pandemic. But I would only be interested in same-sex relationships, and preferably other bi women, because maybe we could understand each other more. It is highly unlikely that I'd pursue anything with a man, but if I ever did, I would only try it with a bi man. Too many straight men out there act like bi chick = free porn show for their entertainment or threesomes galore. Or get jealous. That shit is creepy.

[–]clitoriana 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm just going to reply to myself here with something I've been thinking about lately. I think the redefinition of bisexuality (mostly by actual bisexuals!) to mean "attracted to two or more genders" and the need to insist that bisexuality is not transphobic to avoid getting cancelled in our queer rape culture dystopia is an example of BIPHOBIA. I think it's biphobia that we can no longer call bisexuality what it actually is. I wish these self-hating, delusional weirdos would call themselves gendersexual or something. It's biphobic to obscure and redefine the meaning and reality of bisexuality just so genderpeople won't feel triggered. We don't exist to validate them. NO SEXUALITY EXISTS TO VALIDATE ANYONE ELSE'S IDENTITY.

It also leads to people that aren't even bi identifying as such, like lesbians who identify as bi because they're attracted to "women and nb woman-aligned genders" or some such nonsense. It's like the new version of "queer femmes" - lesbians who can no longer acknowledge that they're lesbians because their partner is FTM or uses they/them pronouns and believes they can't be women because they don't enjoy misogyny.