Am I the asshole for getting mad? I am the blue texts.

submitted by Musky from i.imgur.com

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[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

We should let him know that he's absolutely the asshole in those texts.

This is terrible advice, and literally repeating what Musky did. Aggressively correcting people tends to make them defensive, and gives their defense mechanisms room to paint you as the asshole, and letting them avoid any self-reflection on how their actions were not helping them. Telling Musky he is an asshole is going to be about as effective as telling Mel she is a terrible bitch. Telling Musky as someone who cares about his wellbeing that the way he is responding is counterproductive to what he is trying to accomplish is by far the better tactic here.

[–]Musky[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

Telling Musky as someone who cares about his wellbeing that the way he is responding is counterproductive to what he is trying to accomplish is by far the better tactic here.

It's not counterproductive at all, you're assuming what I'm trying to accomplish is to fix things, go back to where we were. That is impossibro. We cannot move forward, we move sideways.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Yeah, I was assuming at the time you sent that you were simply expressing your anger and wanted her to take some responsibility, rather than trying to end things in a cathartic fashion. I may have totally misread the situation

[–]Musky[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I was doing a bunch of things all at once, but I don't know if a cathartic end is one of them. Penghy was before Melody, she died of liver failure. Otter was before Penghy, she died of liver failure. Here's Mel. There's more to this than my feelings, but they're involved too. It's a big tangled ball of bullshit.